


Warm Like Milk and Honey

by InvisibleSpaz



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Flirting, Fluff, Frottage, Future anal sex scenes, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, He's me, I swear, M/M, Major Depression, Masturbation, Mental Illness, Panic Attacks, Phichit is Yuuri's guardian and wants Yuuri to get laid, Phichit wants him to get that ass, Praise Kink, Slow Burn, Virgin Yuuri!, Yuuri screeches like me when people flirt with him, coffee shop AU, cute shit, i love him though, more tags added as needed, panic disorder
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-01
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-09-21 08:34:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 28,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9539942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InvisibleSpaz/pseuds/InvisibleSpaz
Summary: Coffee shop AU where Viktor is a business man that does Russian translation through an English company. Chris is his best friend who introduces him to The Harmony Coffee Shop and his favorite Barista Yuuri! Yuuri is currently attending university, hating his life and only has one friend. He struggles with his depression and the overwhelming desire to be close to someone. But also fears rejection and the lies that people often tell.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope people are nice about this whole thing. I've never really been the type to post my fanfiction. but since I received a decent amount of kudos for my last fanfiction, I thought I could give this a shot! I hope every enjoys the super fluff!

It was a little ironic, that as children they want to hurry and become adults. But once they become adults, they want nothing more but to return to being children. Yuuri felt like he could relate to the statement in some ways. He had always been a shy child, introverted, and had few friends. It wasn’t a bad thing, it made things a tad bit lonely but as an adult, he wouldn’t mind returning to that time. As an adult, he still only had few friends, and attending University along with working had become his entire life. It was exhausting, and frankly it was awful. He knew that it was to be expected, but every time he walked into his class, or walked into work he felt a moment of dread. This was his life, and he had to talk to people every day about what they wanted to drink. He had to walk into a classroom, listen to pointless lectures by Professors who were incredibly condescending and rude.

It always got to him. Late at night, when he was tired from hours of homework and he had work early the next day he found himself crying. Anxiety and his pillow wet, he thought about quitting everything and just running away. A childish thought, a desire for a vacation, or a world where he could just sleep in his bed for days at a time.

These moments of depression, could dwell for a day or it could turn into weeks to months. But thankfully, the night before had been only a brief moment of anxiety and depression. His morning starting off rather calm. His eyes burned slightly, but after washing his face, he felt more at ease. Thinking that he simply needed to cry to rid himself of the dark thoughts. Yuuri was able to get ready for work without any weight on his shoulders. His walk there rather pleasant, though slightly chilly from the autumn weather. His cheeks feeling slightly dry from the winds. He walked quickly from his apartment, the few blocks burnings his skin before he arrived at the coffee shop. 

It was a small place, though, it received plenty of customers due to the large companies nearby. The morning rush was about to begin he was sure, the young man entering the shop instantly being greeted by one of the baristas. “Good morning Yuuri!” Phichit called, Yuuri waving before unwrapping his scarf. “The wind is brutal today! I’ll make you something warm right away.” Yuuri thanked him before he moved towards the back of the coffee bar and through the back door. Shivering, he quickly removed his scarf and jacket, setting them in his locker before pulling his apron over his head, and tying it. He smiled contently, listening to Phichit speak to a random customer before he headed back out into the shop. “I set your latte on the back counter Yuuri.” Phichit called, facing away from the other while he spoke to a customer. 

Yuuri thanked the other, carefully grabbing the cup before taking a sip. Humming happily as it warmed his belly, taking a moment of silence before the rush hit. “Oh, I forgot to mention Yuuri, April called off today. Turns out one of her girl’s got sick.” Yuuri nearly choked on the cup of coffee. A shiver of dread flooding him before he sighed. That meant it would only be him and Phichit for the day. Not his ideal work day at all.

-x-

Viktor didn’t mind working in America. It was very different from Russia of course, but it was much warmer than what he was used to in Detroit. The people were rather pleasant to be around, and his job wasn’t to bad either. It was easy enough doing translating for the Russian branch, and the work wasn’t exhausting. The only thing that had been difficult in his move, was the jet lag. Still finding it difficult to keep his eyes awake during the day at this job. His eyes blankly staring into his computer screen, the english words beginning to fuse together before his eyes began to close.

He jumped suddenly, realizing that he was beginning to doze off. Suddenly praying for his lunch break so he can get something to eat. Maybe something light would wake him up, give him the energy to finish the day so he could pass out on his couch. Viktor groaned, rubbing his temples before looking back at the computer screen, mumbling to himself briefly before leaning back in his chair. Lunch was only fifth teen minutes away, thankfully. His day passing by rather quickly.

“Viktor~!” The Russian male looked up from his desk, towards the door of his office. “Chris! You finally come by to say hello?” Viktor asked, suddenly feeling more energized now that he was speaking to his best friend. “Sorry, sorry! I had a meeting this morning, and then afterwards I had to conduct an interview for a new assistant.” He apologized, pouting slightly and amusing Viktor. “Another assistant? What happened to the last one?” He asked, leaving his chair and stretching his arms. “Ah, he left, told me something along the lines of, ‘can’t take your demanding attitude’. You know the usual complaints people get when they take on the challenge of being an assistant.” Viktor refrained from laughing, knowing that Chris was probably being more demanding than a normal boss if anything. “Any luck?” He asked out of curiosity, Chris shrugging, “Maybe, I met quite the cutie, but I think he may not survive my high end tastes.” The other male winked at Viktor, the male laughing again. “Maybe you should consider toning it down a bit for him then?” Chris narrowed his eyes, playfully smirking. “You really expect me to ‘tone’ it down? Viktor, please, if I am to do my job perfectly, I need someone who can conform to my perfect ideals.” The other laughed again, “Right, right, please excuse what I said then.”

Chris laughed before looking at his watch on his wrist. “Hey, it’s almost lunch time. Want to go grab some coffee with me?” He asked, Viktor nearly jumping with joy, “Of course! I need coffee more than anything right now!” Viktor admitted, Chris wrapping an arm around the Russian’s shoulders before guiding him from the office. “Then let’s go, I know a great place. All the employees on this floor love heading there.” Chris explained, Viktor listening with excitement.

-x-

It was busy and Yuuri was sure that death was upon him.

Sweat pushed on his brow, his hand holding down the handle on the steamer. Watching the milk bubble in the container, his other hand reaching for the cup that sat comfortably under the espresso machine. Pulling it out after it held its shot comfortably, he reached for his stirring stick, quickly mixing the chocolate and espresso before turning off the steamer. Adding in the milk and stirring the liquid again. Placing the top on the cup, he slid it to his side, Phichit grabbing the item. “Large Mocha for Mark!” The Thai male turned around, grabbing some pastries for another customer. Yuri cleared his throat, moving back to the cash register politely greeting the next customer. “Hello, welcome to the Harmony Coffee Shop. My name is Yuuri, and I will be helping you today.” He smiled, despite the exhaustion he was already feeling. “Hello Yuuri!” The other smiled softly, recalling the gentlemen he saw on a daily. “Afternoon Chris. How are you doing today?” He questioned, “Lovely! I brought you a new customer today. A new coworker of mine, so I hope you’ll take good care of him.” Chris spoke, “Viktor, this is my barista Yuuri.” Chris looked over his shoulder, Yuuri tilting his head to gain a better perspective of the male.

He was rather tall, slim, and fit looking in his suit. A smirk on his features, his silver hair covering one side of his face. “Uh… good afternoon.” Yuuri bowed his head slightly, “My name is Yuuri.” He greeted, a little set off by the attractive male. “Good afternoon Yuuri. My name is Viktor.” He replied, his voice reminding Yuuri of warm milk and honey. “Alright, alright, you’re busy I know. So i’ll have the regular.” Chris waved slightly, Yuuri nodding before pressing his finger against the screen above his cash register. “Right, large cappuccino, with almond milk.” Chris nodding, reaching into his pocket, “Come on Viktor, i’ll buy.” Viktor cleared his throat slightly, looking towards Yuuri again. Smiling once again, when the other met his gaze. “You don’t have to, I have--” “--Just order! Yuuri is very busy. Right Yuuri?” The male’s mouth opened to reply, but he found his tongue dry all of sudden. Spotting the growing line behind the men. “Alright, but i’ll buy tomorrow.” Viktor mutters, stepping beside Chris, Yuuri noting how lovely his eyes looked. 

“What do you recommend Yuuri?” Viktor asked, the male humming, enjoying the way his accent rolled off of his tongue. “Do you prefer sweet? Or bitter?” He asked, forcing himself to sound chipper, and ignoring the smelting feeling in his chest. “Hm… sweet.” Viktor replied, leaning slightly on the counter. “We have a nice french kiss. It has condensed milk, steamed milk and espresso. Very sweet on the tongue.” He replied, feeling a soft warmth on his cheeks. “A french kiss? I love those,” He revealed a toothy grin, “Not the drink I mean.” The other cleared his throat, Viktor laughing softly. “I will have a french kiss then.” He pressed off of the counter, Yuuri inputting the order before stating the price to Chris. The blond paid, all the while eyeing the two males before pulling Viktor off to the side to wait on their drinks.

Yuuri chewed on his bottom lip with anxiety, quickly switching places with Phichit in order to make the drinks. His eye occasionally wandering over to Viktor. The other looking back at him, continuing to smile before leaning over the counter while the male heated up the milk. “Is it hard making coffee?” Viktor questioned, Yuuri shaking his head. “Once… once you memorize everything it’s pretty easy.” He explained, holding onto the steam handle and pulling it upwards to the top of the milk, creating foam for Chris’ drink. “Do you mind if I ask you a question?” The man spoke again, Yuuri turning off the steam, grabbing the cup of espresso. “Go ahead.” He spoke shyly, looking from the corner of his eye once again. The charming smile leaving a pleasant feeling in his chest. “Where are you from? I haven’t heard such a cute accent before.” He asked, truly interested in the other. Yuuri’s cheeks burned from the sudden statement. 

Words flew from his mouth, sputtering words that made little sense before he looked back at the coffee. “J-Japan!” He squeaked out, the word cute swelling on his mind. Sliding Chris’ coffee towards the other, moving to work on Viktor’s. “Heh, who would have thought that I would have the pleasure of meeting such a charming man today.” The other flushed harder, Phichit clearing his throat and grabbing Yuuri’s attention. “Yuuri! Here, I have like five drinks for you.” The other gasped, quickly finishing Viktor’s drink, making sure to take care to make it correctly before handing it to the other male. “Thank you Yuuri.” He replied, the male still flushed before mumbling a ‘you’re welcome’ before moving onto the other drinks.

He found himself distracted by the older male in the shop. Chris and Viktor sitting in the corner, discussing business. He had been called cute by customers before. Though, the majority of them were elderly or unattractive older men who wanted to become Yuuri’s sugar daddy. Frankly it was off putting sometimes, receiving such attention. But this time, he really enjoyed the compliment from the other male. Though, it was always a relief when you meet someone attractive who believes that you are attractive as well. It improved his day, his cheeks still pink while he smiled, occasionally looking back up at the two males. His eyes gazing upon Viktor. The way his hand curved along his pocket, pulling out his cellphone. Or how he pushed his jacket open, revealing his vest in the three piece suit. Yuuri’s teeth tugged on his bottom lip.

“Yuuri!” Phichit called, hot milk sliding against Yuuri’s hand and eliciting a cry from the other. He jumped, almost cursing before pulling back, the milk spilling along the grate and onto the counter. He mumbled apologies before grabbing a few towels. “Are you serious? How long is this going to take?” A woman’s voice gained Yuuri’s attention. “I ordered ten minutes ago! First you take your sweet time talking to other people. I was in line for twenty minutes, then you take your sweet time making the drinks? Can you hurry up or what?” The woman shouted from the counter, leaning over and glaring at Yuuri. “S-Sorry--” He stated, “Of course you are. Can you please just hurry it up? My lunch ends in ten minutes i’d like to have my fucking drink.” Yuuri apologized again, quickly making the woman her drink. His cheeks red from a different reason now.

People could always be so cruel when they were in a hurry. Yuuri mumbling another apology before giving the woman her drink, watching her storm out, mumbling about how awful the service was. He frowned, Phichit rubbing his back. “It’s okay Yuuri. The line is down now, why don’t you go on break?” He asked, Yuuri sniffling before smiling. “Yeah… thanks Phichit I’m sorry--” “--Don’t apologize Yuuri, i’m just glad you didn’t burn your hand.” He reassured, allowing Yuuri to leave from behind the counter. The Japanese male looked towards Viktor and Chris, spotting the other look at him in concern.

Suddenly embarrassed Yuuri fled the coffee shop quickly, standing in the cold breeze and allowing the wind to cool his body temperature.

Of course when he has a good moment, the rest is ruined. He sighed, closing his eyes, trying to contain his tears. It wasn’t like he was always this sensitive. But it was humiliating. Having someone he had been admiring suddenly see him in such a compromising position. “Man, I looked like an idiot.” He breathed, his hands pressing against his face while he groaned. 

_This sucks so much. I can’t believe it. He was so cute too!_ He thought to himself, cursing in Japanese before leaning against the wall of the coffee shop. Yuuri sighed again, closing his eyes briefly while he tried to keep himself from crying once again.

“Yuuri?” The voice of milk and honey was soft to him, Yuuri opening his eyes and catching sight of his concerned feature. Chris standing nearby, also giving a look of concern. “Are you alright?” Viktor asked, Yuuri clearing his throat. “Yeah I’ll be fine!” He attempted to give his best employee tone, seeing Viktor’s eyes narrow briefly. “It’s okay if you’re not.” Viktor replied, “I think you did a great job. You’re a hard worker, and the drink you made me was the best I have ever had.” He reassured, his hand gently patting Yuuri’s shoulder. “You.. you don’t have to flatter me so much.” Yuuri muttered in reply, his cheeks burning once again. “Why not? I think you deserve every kind of flatter.” The Russian man smiled again, the flirtatious grin leaving Yuuri’s knees weak. “I hope to see you tomorrow Yuuri. I want to try everything in this shop, will you make my drink tomorrow?” He asked, Yuuri finding his mouth to dry to speak before he nodded The male laughing before patting his shoulder again. “See you tomorrow Yuuri. Have a better day,” With that, the male left, and Yuuri’s face turned bright red.

He walked back into the coffee shop, Phichit looking over the counter. “Feeling better Yuuri?” His friend asked, “Yes!” He squeaked out, “Oh, are you flustered because of that one guy? I saw you two looking at one another!” Phichit revealed a clear opened mouth grin. “Do it Yuuri. _Do it_.” He spoke, Yuuri moving back behind the counter. “Do what?” He asked, suddenly concerned. “Get him. Do it Yuuri.” The other squeaked in response, “Please don’t.”Yuuri muttered out, Phichit laughing, “It’s a good thing Yuuri!” Phichit wrapped an arm around him, “Here, here, let’s take a snapchat in celebration!” He reached into his pocket, opening up the app before putting on selfie mode. “Say attractive man!” Phichit smiled, giving a peace sign while Yuuri stood completely uncomfortable.


	2. chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phichit and April really want Yuuri to get laid.  
> Yuuri wants to slam his face into an espresso machine.  
> Viktor is a big dork who loves hearing Yuuri laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It makes me very happy to see people actually reading this ;n; I really do appreciate it.  
> Thank you for your comments and your kudos! Also, if anyone has any suggestions for kinks, please do tell me and I will hopefully add them in later on. So far, Yuuri has a praise kink and is loving those hands. LMAO

He thought that he was rather conservative when it came to masturbation. He had never really done it in the past and it became something frequent once he came to the U.S. Stress, loneliness and exhaustion brought it on one night, and depending on his mood it became much more common for him. Yuuri used it to release any tension in his hips, or the anxiety he had been feeling. But after the day he had, he couldn’t help the weird tingling in his hips. Having someone call him cute was much too simple. The praise on his mind when he took a shower. His cheeks slightly pink as he thought about the way fingers curled into the pockets of the man’s slacks. Yuuri hadn’t thought about it at first, but his fingers were long and elegant, the male wondering what it would be like to feel them against his lips and his tongue.

His sudden fantasy was slightly off putting, surprising the other before he groaned. His whole body wiggling while he cursed himself. “Stop it~!!!!” He spoke to himself, groaning before tilting his head back. How immature and annoying for him to fantasize about someone because they _complimented_ him. He shivered at his foolishness before taking a shower. His hips still tingling shyly, annoying him further. It had been a stressful day afterall… his feet were aching from standing for so long. His back was also protesting against his posture for the day. Yuuri’s lips pressed tightly together, humming before taking a moment to indulge in the hot water.

Allowing the water to hit his back, he slowly leaned downward, attempting to touch his toes and fully stretch his back. It relaxed him, a soft moan leaving his mouth as he straightened. He licked his lips, looking down at his hips to his cock. Finding it soft, though twitching in anticipation for what he was planning to do.

He only considered it to be a stress releaser… nothing more after all. He couldn’t let anyone know he had a habit of doing it. He found it far to embarrassing. His fingers slid along his hip, a thumb rubbing along the base slowly. His cheeks already turning bright red as he tenderly rubbed soft circles into the flesh. The skin still covered the tip of his cock as he stimulated an erection. The cock slowly twitching before pressing against his thigh. Half-hard now, he finally stroked the flesh, his head peeking out from behind the foreskin before he tugged hard. His soft thighs trembling for a moment before he leaned against the shower wall. The spray blocking his vision, as he continued the slow strokes. He had heard that touching the head felt good for most men who was uncircumcised but he had never really given it a shot before. He bit his bottom lip, his thumb gently touching the tip, his hips jolting forward, a gasp leaving his lips. He found the head completely sensitive, his fingers gently toying with the red skin before he returned to stroking. It made things a lot faster that was for sure. He whimpered, his head leaning back. 

Precum leaked from the tip, dripping into the water and draining away quickly. His nerves were on edge with each tug of his wrist, his eyes closing while his eyebrows furrowed together. He thought about the long fingers once again. The warm Russian accent. _Cute, he called me cute._ He thought to himself, whimpering again as the nerves in his hips heightened, the pressure in his stomach and behind his balls tightened and snapped, his climax finally hitting him.

He moaned, his mouth slipping open as he rode out the orgasm. His legs feeling heavy as he recovered. He cursed in his native tongue, the water running cold against his skin. “How… dirty!” He practically screamed, covering his face and groaning before throwing his head back and forth. “What is wrong with me?!?!?!” He asked himself, his cheeks bright red as he sulked in the shower.

-x-

He suddenly felt anxious when he walked into work. Recalling the foreign man’s promise to see him. After what he had done the night before, he was sure that he was going to hell for the sinner he was. Of course it was a joke when he thought about it. But still, how could he look the man in the eye, knowing that he had fantasized about his hands and his praise. 

Yuuri sulked quietly as he entered the shop, mumbling a good morning to Phichit. “Good morning Yuuri! I’ll start on your morning drink.” He thanked his friend before heading back behind the bar. Getting ready for work before returning and taking a sip of his latte. “Good news, April is coming in at ten today!” Phichit grinned, “Oh thank goodness, I cannot take another day like yesterday.” Yuuri admitted, “I understand completely, were your feet hurting as bad as mine? I could have cried when I got home.” Phichit complained, waving his hand, “We should go to a spa one of these days Yuuri. We need a massage before we get a bone spur.” A spa didn’t sound to bad, in fact it reminded Yuuri of home. His parents owned an onsen, and he had grown up around the place and helped out whenever he could. He could recall how wonderful it was, after having a long exhausting day and soaking in the onsen for a while before passing out on his bed. 

“Maybe after our next paycheck. I just bought my textbooks so i’m barely making rent this month.” Yuuri responded, forcing himself from his memories. “I don’t know why you won’t room with me and my roommate! He’s a really nice guy Yuuri.” Phichit pouted slightly, bending over to clean out the pastry case of any crumbs that had been created. “I don’t know. Sorry I just… I would love to room with you but--” To be honest he did not want to room with someone he didn’t know. Phichit was his best friend, and he would have loved to room with him. But the two had only met last semester. Phichit had already been living with someone, and Yuuri didn’t want to force his best friend into moving into a new place with him.

“Maybe i’ll just move in with you then!” Yuuri laughed nervously, “No, no I can’t put you out like that. Maybe next semester?” Hopefully Phichit roommate would move out by then and Yuuri could take his place. “Ugh, you wouldn’t be putting me out Yuuri. It must suck having to pay for the apartment on your own. Plus we get along so well.” The Japanese male shrugged his shoulders, Phichit sighing before standing up and closing the pastry case door. “Alright, alright, next semester for sure though.” He grinned, giving Yuuri a thumbs up as the shop door opened. “Good morning, welcome to Harmony Coffee!” Phichit called, leaning over the case, smiling coyly before looking towards Yuuri. “Hey, your new regular is here.” He whispered, Yuuri’s heart suddenly jumping before looking over the counter. “Oh, hello! I wasn’t sure if you worked this early.” The warm voice spoke, smiling brightly. He was in a different suit this time, a lighter gray color that complimented his silver hair. “G-Good morning.” Yuuri spoke, pushing his glasses up slightly onto the bridge of his nose. “How are you feeling today?” Viktor asked, walking up to the counter, his hands slipping into his pockets. “I’m o-okay.” He replied, his cheeks slightly pink from the memory of last night.

The other smirked, looking rather amused by his flustered nature. _Oh my god does he somehow know? What if he somehow knows?! Oh god I came to the thought of his hands. What the fuck am I?_ Yuuri thought to himself. “Good, i’m glad.” Yuuri bit his bottom lip, looking over at Phichit, the other kneeling back down by the case and giving Yuuri a thumbs up of encouragement. “Oh… how are you today?” Yuuri asked suddenly, “Great, now that i’ve had a chance to see you.” Yuuri squeaked in response, his ears burning pink before he mumbled a thank you. “You are just so cute Yuuri.” Viktor’s head tilted slightly, his silver hair moving and revealing his other eye. “N-No i’m not.” He mumbled, “Oh but you are. Look at how red you are, just the sweetest thing.” He jolted at the next compliment, looking back at Phichit who nodded and mouthed the word “agree and compliment” from his lips. “T-Thank you.” Yuuri spoke, “You… you are…” He looked at the other, watching him shift between his feet. The suit clinging to his chest and sides perfectly. He looked fit under the material, much more in shape than Yuuri was. But man he would love to climb that tree.

“You’re gorgeous.” He breathed, nearly choking as he caught himself. “I--I mean--Sorry, what can I get you!” His words flew from his mouth at a mile per minute. His eyes closed as he tried to contain his embarrassment. 

Viktor laughed, creating a pleasant ring in Yuuri’s ears as he forced his eyes open. “Thank you Yuuri!” His smile made Yuuri’s knees feel weak. Finding this man way too bright for this early time of the morning. “May I have one of those french kisses again? I do love them after all.” He smirked suddenly, Yuuri clearing his throat and quickly inputting the order. He spoke the total, watching the thin hands reach into his pocket and pull out his wallet. Opening the flap and pulling out a five before presenting it to Yuuri. He grabbed it gingerly, their fingers brushing. “Thank you.” He managed to squeak out before putting the bill away and presenting the change to Viktor. Their fingers brushed once more, Yuuri trying not to recall the fantasy from the night before he moved towards the espresso machine. 

He turned his focus onto the coffee, Viktor moving to watch Yuuri work in silence. Smiling with the same charm as the day before that gave Yuuri some flatter. “You look pretty cute when you make coffee.” Viktor spoke suddenly, “W-What?” His voice practically squeaking before he cleared his throat. Phichit looking upwards at Yuuri suddenly, still in front of the case again, still grinning before clearing his throat and standing. “I’m going to go stock the back.” He stated, Yuuri looking back at the other. “O-Okay,” He was nervous again, looking back down at the steaming milk. His fingers trembled slightly, recalling how he had spilled the milk everywhere and had been yelled at for it. Of course it had been an accident, but he didn’t want to be embarrassed again. “Am I making you nervous?” Viktor asked, looking slightly concerned. “O-oh, it’s not you.” Maybe it was a bit due to Viktor. He would have been nervous after the incident anyway. But, having someone attractive see you make a mistake made it so much worse. “I…” He trailed off, turning off the steamer and pouring the milk into the cup.

“I was just nervous that I would mess up like I did yesterday.” He admitted, his cheeks softly turning pink as he handed the coffee to Viktor. The man taking a little sip before speaking, “It tastes as amazing as it did yesterday! I think you did great Yuuri.” The Japanese male flushed from the praise, keeping himself from licking his bottom lip. “I-It’s not that great.” He spoke rather quietly, “Please Yuuri, it’s okay to admit it when you’re good at something.” Viktor replied, leaning over the counter slightly, “Just be more confident!” Viktor took another sip of his drink, Yuuri staring at the other. He was just so sociable somehow. His smile was too bright for Yuuri, and his praise sent a shiver of joy down his spine. “That… sounds a little impossible for me.” He laughed nervously, Viktor looking rather unsatisfied with the answer. Humming before the sound of his phone going off cut his thoughts short.

Viktor slipped his phone from his pocket, Yuuri realizing that it was an alarm, indicating that it was time for him to head to work. “I have to get going… but Yuuri. Please do try to have more confidence. You make good coffee, and you are always very polite to people. You do your job well.” He explained, his voice incredibly soft. The silver haired male turned around, heading towards the door as he pocketed his phone. “Oh! I almost forgot! Yuuri, i’ll come by at lunch time. You can be my ‘pick me up’.” Viktor laughed, leaving the coffee shop behind, and Yuuri’s face a bright red.

He pushed his glasses up with his finger tips, Phichit coming from the back door. “Did he leave? I was listening from the behind the door!” His best friend wrapped his arms around Yuuri’s neck, tugging him against his chest. “Yuuri! He is so sweet! Do it Yuuri! Get him!” The other screamed, Yuuri still standing completely flustered. “You should have agreed that you were cute! You should have asked him out!” Yuuri admired Phichit’s energy towards the situation. Despite how hard his heart was currently pounding. “I can’t say that!” Yuuri replied, “It is way to embarrassing! Besides he’s just…” No way were the compliments real anyway. He looked like an important individual. For a huge company that Yuuri could never work for. He worked at a coffee shop and remembered how to use an espresso machine. His job was not hard, but this stranger probably worked hard and had a job that took years and years of training. How could he compare to a man with such status. 

Yuuri frowned, Phichit continuing to talk in his ear in an attempt to build up his confidence. 

He felt distracted for the next few hours, thinking about the silver haired Russian that was currently melting his heart. He had never really dated anyone before, and he couldn’t help but recall how he had fantasized it when he was younger. Going on dates and having sex, the usual things people wanted when it came to relationships. Now that he was older, Yuuri wasn’t even sure he was mentally ready for a relationship. Not that Viktor was really looking for one. He might just enjoy seeing Yuuri’s reactions, which was something he was seriously considering.

Even if he was serious. Yuuri barely had any confidence in himself and had bigger issues to worry about, like classwork, actual work and trying to keep his depression at bay. He didn’t have time to go on dates… even if they were with a beautiful man whom he had already fantasized about. He felt stressed out even more somehow, Phichit noticing after some time and reassuring Yuuri that even if it was just flirting, there was no harm in responding. He had to admit, the idea of flirting did sound fun… though he didn’t know how to do it exactly. Not when Viktor was obviously good at it.

\--x--

When April arrived, Phichit was able to go on lunch, Yuuri finding some relief when he saw the girl. She was older than Phichit and himself, in her thirties and raising three kids on her small salary that she received from the small shop. She was nice, Yuuri taking comfort when she was around. “Sorry I wasn’t here yesterday Yuuri! My youngest was sick from school and I couldn’t find a babysitter.” April admitted, Yuuri responding with an encouraging smile. “Don’t worry about it! Is she feeling better?” April nodded, “She just had an earache, wanted cuddles the whole day. I liked the rest actually.” She laughed, “Anything good happen yesterday?” She questioned, leaning against the back counter, Yuuri quietly cleaned out the espresso machine. “No, nothing special.” The girl hummed quietly, “...Phichit told me another story.” He could already feel his ears burn as he looked over his shoulder at the other. “...About what?” He already knew the answer the girl had. Cursing Phichit and his gossiping ways of trying to get Yuuri laid. “There was a boy.” She smiled coyly, “Mhm?” Yuuri frowned, slightly annoyed with their persistence. “He said you were cute.” She poked his sides, the male jolting, moving to rub his soft sides. That was one way to remind Yuuri of his soft love handles and soft belly. “S-So?” He stuttered, “So? So, that is a good thing! You should be happy!” He hung his head slightly, sighing before looking over his shoulder. 

“I-it’s no big deal.” He mumbled, “It is a big deal!” Yuuri attempted to ignore April’s similar talk that Phichit gave him. Luckily, the lunch rush began, Yuuri feeling relief as April took the first order, asking Yuuri to make the coffee and forcing her to drop the subject.

The lines went down quickly once Phichit had came back from lunch, Yuuri having to hold back until the rush ended if he wanted to take a break. He ignored his slight hunger by eyeing the coffee he was making. A sudden tap on the counter behind the espresso machine shocked the man. His body jumping as he looked up, seeing a Russian man with a suddenly concerned face. “Sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you.” He spoke, Yuuri’s face burning as he cleared his throat. “It’s okay. I was just focusing.” Viktor’s eyebrows furrowed together, distracting the Japanese male before he moved back to look at his drink. “Sorry again.” Viktor laughed nervously, catching Yuuri’s interest slightly. He hadn’t seen this nervous nature yet. “...How was your morning?” Yuuri asked suddenly, finding the other a little less intimidating.

“It was okay. A little exhausting.” Viktor admitted, “But i’m sure you’ve been working harder. The line is almost gone now. I heard from my office that sometimes the line stretches outside the door!” Yuuri smiled, enjoying his enthusiasm, “You should see us on black friday.” Viktor winced, “Oh my, just thinking about it makes me cringe. I didn’t even think about how rough it might be. Everyone waking up so earlier would want something to keep them going.” It was one of their busiest times of the year. Yuuri hated working the day, at least until around twelve when things suddenly died. After the morning ended, people just wobbled home with their goods and passed out. As for others, they went in the middle of the day and didn’t need a coffee to keep going.

“Is your day going well? Despite the rush?” He asked, leaning against the counter. Yuuri nodded, “Our third person came in today so things are a lot better than yesterday.” April and Phichit talked on the side, the two occasionally eyeing them. “Great! Plus you did a great job during the rush right?” He looked even more enthusiastic about the situation. Yuuri wondering how this man could go from gorgeous to adorable in one day. He nodded, the other grinning happily, “Wonderful! See I told you! You’re great on your job!” Yurri snorted with sudden laughter, how could this person be so upbeat so suddenly? 

Yuuri shook his head, moving to grab another coffee cup, beginning to make a new drink. “Ah… Yuuri you continue to charm me. Now that I have heard such a beautiful laugh.” The other choked suddenly, looking up at Viktor. Spotting the man smiling with a soft pink blush against his cheeks. “No! It isn’t that.” He quickly looked back down, not wanting to be charmed by the soft blush on Viktor’s face. He added in espresso to condensed milk, moving to steam more milk. 

“It is! The cutest one I have ever heard.” Yuuri pouted slightly, “Y-You’re only trying to embarrass me.” Viktor grinned playfully, “I am hoping to hear you laugh again.” He hummed, looking down at the steaming milk. “N-No one would want to hear it.” He stirred the drink before placing a cap on the top. “I would love to hear it more.” It was incredibly hard to believe that someone wanted to hear something so simple. 

Yuuri held out the cup suddenly, “Here, a french kiss.” He smiled, Viktor blinking, “Oh, I didn’t pay yet--” “--It’s on the house.” He replied, the two staring at one another for a moment before he carefully took the drink. “Thank you.” Yuuri admired the sweet smile he received, hoping that he could see it every day from now on. 

They fell silent for a few moments, Viktor looking down at the cup, looking slightly uneasy before finally opening his mouth. “Yuuri, have you lived here for a long time?” He questioned suddenly, Yuuri nodding, “I go to school here.” He leaned against the espresso machine slightly. Quietly admiring the other man’s beauty. “Do you know this city well? I’m still new, it would be nice to get a tour.” His heart throbbed suddenly. Yuuri swallowing dryly before looking towards Phichit and April. The two giving the worst childish grins of their lives. Viktor tilting his head slightly as he caught on, “Your friends look… very happy today.” He stated, “...They’re idiots just…” He winced, looking back at Viktor. “Yuuri… will you show me around the city?” He was suddenly straightforward, shooting anxiety into Yuuri’s very soul.

_Was I just asked out on a date?_ His throat ran dry as he stared blankly at the Russian. _Holy hell, I was just asked out!_ He wanted to drop on the ground and roll around suddenly. The urge to screech in shock and anxiety was in his throat. “You don’t have to--” “--I would like too!” He shouted suddenly, trying to withhold the gasp from his throat. _Oh my god I said yes. I said yes._ He wanted to slam his head into the espresso machine and run away. This was actually happening, someone was asking this poor nerd on a date. “Perfect!” Viktor beamed again, “When are you free?” He asked, “Tomorrow is my day off.” It would be Friday after all, lucky enough to not have classes and he didn’t have to work at the coffee shop. “I see… I have work until five. Do you mind meeting up after I work?” He asked, “I don’t mind, do you want me to meet you here?” Yuuri was attempting to act normal, his heart still pounding in his ears. “That sounds wonderful! I cannot wait to see you tomorrow.” Viktor’s phone went off suddenly, the man clicking his tongue, dropping his head. “Sorry Yuuri, I have to go back to work. I really do look forward to tomorrow though.” He lifted his head, taking a sip of the drink. “Perfect drink once again Yuuri.” The man turned around, taking his phone out and silencing the alarm. 

He went to leave the coffee shop, still looking at his phone before suddenly stopping. “Oh wait, Yuuri, can I have your cell phone number? Just in case something comes up tomorrow?” He looked back over at Yuuri, returning to the counter. “O-Oh, that would be a good idea…” Yuuri trailed off, reaching into his pocket and pulling his phone out. “Here, put your number in mine.” Viktor handed his phone over, Yuuri doing the same. A moment passed before they returned one another’s phone.

Yuuri had written his full name in the contact list, realizing that Viktor actually had the name Yuri in his phone already. “Yuuri Kastuki, lovely name I think.” Yuuri laughed nervously, looking down at the new contact in his own phone. 

‘Viktor Nikiforov’

With that, Viktor left the coffee shop. Leaving Yuuri to release a sudden screech of anxiety. His two coworkers slamming into him with a sudden group hug. “You did so well Yuuri!” They cried, Yuuri shaking his head, making strange noises of distress. “Oh god!” He stated, “I said yes!” He turned in their arms, the two people laughing. “You did a good job Yuuri.” The other screeched again, “I need to take a lunch, I think I am going to die.” He laughed, covering his face to hide the bright pink blush. “Go ahead Yuuri, you will need the mental preparation.” Phichit patted the man’s shoulders. “You’ll do great Yuuri. It’ll be so fun!” Right… fun. He took in a deep breath, realizing that he might have lived in the city for a while now… but he had no idea where everything was.

Yuuri had really only been to one place that wasn’t school and work. That was an ice skating rink. A place he rarely went too. But it reminded him of home, recalling the local rink his mom had taken him to a few times. But Viktor may not find that… to exciting. Now he had to look up nice places to take the man. His stomach knotted suddenly, oh god he had to fulfill expectations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to write smut. So I did. I write a shit ton, to be perfectly honest. But this is the first time I have ever written Yuuri in that type of situation. Hopefully it wasn't disappointing.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri tries to find a nice place to take Viktor and is met with his usually anxiety! But thankfully, cute text messages eases him into the date and it turns out they have a wonderful time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also let it be known that if its italicized, its in a different language c: I could go through google translate. But to be perfectly honest, I know google translate can mess things up and end up creating weird errors. Since I'm not good in either language, I hope no one minds the italics.

Where in the fuck was he supposed to take Viktor too? He had never been to any sort of college hang out before. He normally remained in doors, or he kept himself from hanging out in huge crowds. It was a horrible pressure on his shoulders, staring at his laptop and tapping away at the buttons while he looked up similar searches. “Top places in Detroit” or “College spots in Detroit.” Nothing seemed to pop out to him. In fact, he was struggling to even pick out any place because he did not know much about Viktor at all. His heart pounded, sighing before looking at his phone. He had Viktor’s number. He could simply ask him. Though, what if Viktor was already in bed? It was only eight at night, but Yuuri couldn’t be to sure about his sleeping habits. Or what if Viktor thought it was annoying for him to ask. He buried his face in his hands for a few moments, humming to himself in an effort to calm himself down. He couldn’t very well just pick something and have Viktor hate it. It was normal to ask someone where they wanted to go when it came to dates right? 

He fumbled with his fingers, looking at his phone on the occasion before finally picking it up. Locating Viktor’s name, he stared at the empty text message box, frowning as he concentrated.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Hello, this is Yuuri Katsuki, from the coffee shop!   
How is your night going? I hope it is going well.  
I’m doing homework right now, and I was thinking about you!  
I wasn’t sure what type of places you wanted to go to  
So if you have any requests, please tell me!**

He narrowed his eyes at the message, “That is way to formal! Of course he would know who you are! You don’t have to say your from the shop!” He groaned, erasing the entire message.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Hey it’s Yuuri!  
I was thinking about our date tomorrow  
Is there somewhere you want to go?**

He frowned slightly, recalling that someone else in Viktor’s phone had been named Yuri. What if Viktor thought that he was that Yuri? That would be horrible, not only that, what if Yuri was his boyfriend? _What if this guy plans on making me his… side hoe?_ Even the word was insulting to him. He erased the message again, leaning back into his bed sheets. Maybe he could ask Phichit on what he should do? Though his friend would probably scream at him to just go to Viktor’s house and get laid. Yuuri sighed, pouting. Maybe he had made a mistake, he should have politely declined the date and just… fantasize about those fingers again. His eyes closed, thinking about the man’s compliments again. His smile and the laughter he gave off. He seemed so warm. Lacking a mean bone in his body. His smile reminded him of a genuine person and a phrase he had heard some people say before. A simple explanation as to why some people just liked others, “they had a nice person’s smile.” That was a good way to describe Viktor. At least from the small interactions they had. But at times that was all that was needed to give off a pure impression.

Yuuri took a deep breath, his fingers moving to his pajama bottoms. His thumb running along the hem of the material before he slipped his fingers under the waistband. He smiled briefly, thinking of the beautiful fingers and voice against his skin. He would love to have that man in between his legs, breathing in his scent. Fuck, he wondered what Viktor smelled like. His hips twitched, his hands drifting over his clothed cock. Gently running circles over the material, feeling the ticklish pleasure beginning to press into his hips. 

His eyes shot open when the sound of his notifications went off. 

The male sitting up quickly and reaching for his phone. “Oh god…” He trailed off, his face burning pink. He was about to jerk off again, how god damn embarrassing. He took in a deep breath before he cleared his throat. Looking at his phone to see that he had received a text message…. From Viktor Nikiforov.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Good evening \ (•◡•) /  
How are you?**

Yuuri relaxed his shoulders, settling back in his blankets, setting his laptop to his side.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Hi! I’m good!   
How about you?**

He sent the message, praying that it wasn’t to simple. His worries disappeared a moment later, the male responding quickly.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
I was tired but now I feel great  
Since I got to talk to you \ (•◡•) /**

His cheeks burned red suddenly, Yuuri rolling over onto his stomach and buried his face into his pillows. He groaned, wondering why this stranger was so damn interested in him so suddenly.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
You keep doing that! ｡゜(｀Д´)゜｡  
At this rate I will turn into a   
Cherry tomato!**

He sent the text message, leaning against his pillows, his cheeks softly pink. 

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Good!  
You look adorable when you blush!  
Reminds me that I can’t wait  
To see you tomorrow!**

Yuuri smiled at the cute emojis he was sending, chuckling softly. How could he be so interested in something so small? His fingers hovered over the keyboard, wondering how he should respond. It was nice hearing all of his compliments. Being wanted was something he had never really felt before. A terrifying experience he wasn’t sure he was ready for. After all… what if this stranger had ill intentions? He didn’t know him. He wasn’t sure of his age, where he worked exactly, or even what his hobbies were. For all he knew, this man could be looking for a new gimp to add to his Sunday night collections. Not that Yuuri was against that type of behavior, but he was not the one to wear rubber and bark like a dog. He sighed, leaning against his pillow again, his nerves on edge before he finally gained the courage to respond.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Im excited about tomorrow  
But im also a little nervous.  
Can I ask you some questions?**

He sent the text message before he got a chance to rethink it. Feeling the anxiety bubble in his chest and begin to suffocate him. What if Viktor didn’t want to answer any questions? What if he was offended by it? Worse, what if he didn’t like what Viktor said, and he was a total weirdo that wanted to sell his organs on Craig’s list? Yuuri jumped when his phone went off, his heart pounding as he gazed at the response.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
As long as I can ask you some! (•◡•)**

The Japanese male smiled, his cheeks slightly pink as he sat up and got more comfortable.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Sure!  
Where do you work?**

Their texting lasted throughout the entire night. Yuuri laughing to himself whenever Viktor responded with his pure enthusiasm that Yuuri was coming to enjoy. Viktor was twenty-seven years old, he was a Russian translator for a company that specialized in exports and imports from different countries. He had only been in the U.S for about a month now, and he had only managed to befriend Chris. But he hoped that him and Yuuri could become friends as well. It was a connection he hadn’t foreseen between them. Once they began to engage, Yuuri felt comfortable and responded as quickly as he could. Viktor responded in his own record speed and before Yuuri knew it, it was nearly two in the morning and he realized that Viktor had work that morning.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Viktor its so late!   
You should go to bed!**

He got out of bed and put his laptop away, getting ready for bed while eyeing his phone for a response. A few moments passing before his phone went off once again.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
I had no idea! When you mentioned it  
I jumped right into bed!  
I dont want to fall asleep on you tomorrow  
So i will go to bed now ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ  
Good night sweet Yuuri!**

Yuuri smiled softly as he crawled into his own bed, staring at the cute message before wishing the other sweet dreams. He couldn’t help but feel giddy by the endless conversation. Feeling more comfortable and secure about meeting Viktor the next day. Able to curl happily in his blankets and pillows. He settled easily, sighing as he began to drift to sleep.

He forgot to pick out a place to take Viktor.

-x-

He realized when he woke up that he had no idea where he was going to take Viktor. Groaned as he rolled along his bed and blankets and forced himself to get back on his laptop and continue his google search for a place to take the man. There was plenty of places to go in Detroit, but nothing seemed to scream a first date for Yuuri. The man wanted him to show him around the city, but the majority of places were bars and museums. He wasn’t even sure Viktor enjoyed that sort of thing, and as for bars, Yuuri wasn’t a huge fan of drinking. He thought about the skating rink again, but he figured that the rink wouldn’t last them for too long. Plus, it may be to busy until later in the evening. It was more of the ending to a perfect night if he thought about it. If Viktor wanted to go of course. 

His searched turned up something rather interesting after another half an hour of continuous research. It was a cultural bazaar on the farther end of town. A place where they had different foods from around the world. It looked like there was a Russian and Japanese stand there among the many others and he thought that maybe Viktor would enjoy some food that he was familiar with. Not only that, but Yuuri wouldn’t mind tasting some traditional Japanese food again. He missed his mother’s home cooking and he hoped to find his favorite dishes. It was overall simple. But if Viktor disliked the idea, maybe they could decide to go somewhere else together then. Though he would be a bit disappointed if he couldn’t taste his favorite dishes once again. Hell, maybe they would even have Katsudon there. His mouth watered at the very idea, suddenly feeling excited again.

Though it was still in the morning, Yuuri took his time staring into his closet. Eyeing all of his clothes in hopes to find decent. He was sadly disappointed to see that the majority of his clothing was either for school or work. They were mostly old except the new winter coat his mother had sent him from home. It was a tan button up that didn’t seem to special. Though it appeared to be the only nice thing he currently owned. He sighed, holding the material in his hands before tossing it onto his bed. How horribly embarrassing it was, having to wear an old jacket that his mother had bought him. What made it worse, was that he was in a similar situation with the rest of his wardrobe. He needed to go shopping for clothes more than anything. He thought about heading out as soon as he could. But knowing himself, Yuuri would feel to burned out to go on the date that night if he was out for too long in the morning. 

He cursed his introverted nature and his easily exhausted mental state. He hummed to himself as he looked at his shirts, trying on a few and deciding that most of them made him look more overweight than he actually was. He wouldn’t call himself obese or something to that nature, but he was definitely on the chunky side, a little added skin on his stomach, thighs and love handles. He usually wasn’t to self conscious about it… but the shirts he had made him feel way more exposed. Not that he planned on removing his jacket. It was still cold out, and if they were going to the bazaar he wouldn’t be removing his jacket. It was relieving and helped him pick out a looser shirt. Though it was a little raggedy, he felt more comfort with it. Seeing that it didn’t cling to his stomach like the others. He would certainly go shopping on his next day off. 

His clothes were picked out, and Yuuri found himself beyond early then he had originally thought. Realizing that getting ready for his first date was not an all day task. But just sitting around only created more nerves than he wanted to deal with. So, he took his time cleaning up his apartment, vacuuming, dusting, and laundry passed the time easily. Distracting him from the mistakes that could be made that evening. His thoughts drifting to his phone for a brief moment, wondering if Viktor was too tired to even go on the date. 

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
How are you feeling today?**

 

-x-

Viktor needed coffee and a lot of it. He was not the type to stay up late and was more of a morning person. But when he woke up that morning, he found his eyes burning in exhaustion, and his head pounding from lack of sleep. It improved as he arrived at work, but he continued to have trouble keeping his eyes open. He thought about going to Harmony, but he felt a little disappointed when he realized that Yuuri wouldn’t be there. It made the walk seem pointless, and he settled with the idea of asking Chris’ assistant to bring him some coffee. Chris didn’t seem to mind, and the assistant, though he seemed annoyed, was nice enough to get Viktor a cup. He found it rather bitter and bland, lacking any sweetness. He clicked his tongue, quickly drinking it, and trying to ignore the awful taste. Yuuri made way better coffee. Given it was an incredibly sweet drink, but the actual coffee was good quality as well. It put him in a slightly sour mood while he looked over the recent files he had been sent. Reading over the translation and ensuring that everything was in correct order. Last thing the company needed was a mistranslation that said “Fuck you” instead of “Thank you” not, that those two phrases were close. But it was still a huge concern when talking to another country. 

He sighed, leaning against his desk, closing his eyes briefly before smiling softly. The Japanese man had taken him up on his advances. It was a risk, but seeing the charming young man with a sweet smile melted his heart. His squeaks and his flushed face was adorable, and he gave it a shot. Though he had been worried that the two wouldn’t get along, last night text messages gave him more confidence that Yuuri might actually begin a relationship with him. Viktor yawned, hearing his phone go off before he quickly grabbed it. Smiling he felt amused by the male’s concern.

**To Yuuri Katsuki  
A little sad without your coffee  
But excited for tonight!**

He sent the message, stretching his arms and leaned back in his chair. Looking idly at the clock. He still had most of his shift to finish, finding himself disappointed once again that he would have to wait longer to see Yuuri.

**From Yuuri Katsuki  
Me too! I found this Cultural Baazar  
It has a lot of food from around the world!  
Is that something you would be interested in?**

Viktor hummed, thinking briefly about how there may be Russian cuisine involved. That would be something nice to do. He could introduce Yuuri to his favorite Russian dishes! The idea of exciting and he quickly responded to Yuuri’s message.

**To Yuuri Katsuki  
That sounds fun!  
I hope they have my favorite food there!**

Viktor looked back at his screen, realizing that if he didn’t finish his documents for the day, he would have to stay over later. The man cringing when he realized that he needed to meet up with Yuuri and still needed to change his clothes before meeting the other. He was indeed wearing a suit, but if they were going to a bazaar he found his attire a little inappropriate for the situation. He set himself to quickly finish his documents, only stopping to respond to the text messages Yuuri had sent him. The two playfully talking to one another about staying up to late. Not that Viktor minded, he would love to do it again. 

-x-

Yuuri had arrived earlier than he had planned. To be honest, he thought that his anxiety would make him walk a lot slower than he had. But he realized about halfway down the street that he wasn’t entirely nervous, but he was rather excited. Texting had helped ease his nerves a bit, especially with how excited Viktor seemed to be when it came to the bazaar. They had connected well through texts, and he felt a little closer to the man. Though it would be different when they were physically, Yuuri was feeling hopeful about the situation.

But as he stood in the cold, he found himself feeling just a bit antsy, staring at his phone as the clock moved closer and closer to designated time for them to meet he wondered if he would even show. _What if he doesn’t show tonight? Then he comes in tomorrow and laughs at me!_ He frowned, thinking of the horrible humiliation he would have to face if that were to occur. He frowned, looking towards Harmony cafe, spotting a few coworkers who he rarely saw. What would they think of seeing him waiting around like this? Perhaps they figured out that he was being stood up. That would make things worse, the rumors around work would swim around him and he would be even more humiliated.

“Yuuri!” The warm voice shocked him, the male looking upwards and spotting his new Russian friend. His grin was wide, cheeks slightly red from the cold and slightly out of breath. “Thank goodness! I’m sorry for being a little late. I had to finish my work, then run home to change.” His accent was thick as he attempted to focus, slightly rough from the cold and running. “Please do forgive me Yuuri.” He looked at him in concern, Yuuri smiling in relief. “Thank you for coming!” He bowed his head slightly, realizing that he might have come off as strange. He lifted his head, his cheeks pink with blush before he straighten. “Sorry, I… I am just relieved to see that you came.” He admitted, “Of course I came! I was the one who asked you sweet Yuuri! I have been looking forward to this all day.” Viktor reached for him, grabbing onto his hands swiftly and clasping them together. “Let’s have fun!” He was grinning, his elegant hands clinging to Yuuri’s and reminding the man of the last time he masturbated. 

Yuuri retracted his hands suddenly, Viktor looking at him curiously before Yuuri cleared his throat. “Right! I was thinking we could take a taxi, since the bazaar is further down town.” Viktor nodded, “Sounds good to me!”

The ride to the bazaar was surprisingly easy going for the two. Talking about their day and how Yuuri admitted to needing new clothes. Viktor offered to take him shopping, but the idea seemed a little far in the future for Yuuri. But he agreed anyway, thinking it might be fun to have someone new to spend time with. He felt more confident when he actually started talking to Viktor. He was a very easy going person Yuuri realized, that he enjoyed sightseeing, gasping whenever they passed by a landmark. Mumbling to himself before Yuuri promised to take him to see it another day. Promises being made so easily, like he genuinely wanted to to spend more time with this person. A friend that you connected with easily. He laughed at Viktor’s childish responses, his anxiety disappearing and being replaced with excited. 

When they arrived, Viktor insisted on paying for the taxi ride, Yuuri feeling slightly guilty but quickly forgetting the moment they spotted the entrance to the bazaar. It looked rather simple,two large poles stood on the side of the entrance, a banner hanging between them stating in huge letters, “Cultural Bazaar!” along with the phrase ‘welcome’ stated in many different languages in small letters underneath. “Wow!” Viktor shouted, grinning foolishly, “Ah! I hope they have piroshki!” He looked towards Yuuri, “Have you ever had it?” The other shook his head, “It is a baked bun full of meat! It tastes amazing!” Yuuri couldn’t help but admire how adorable Viktor’s accent was when he spoke with such excitement. “We have to try something from Japan too Yuuri! What would you like?” Viktor asked, Yuuri humming for a second, “Maybe they’ll have my favorite. Katsudon!” He grinned in response, “It’s a fried porkcutlet bowl! Very delicious!” The two talked happily about their favorite foods as they entered the bazaar, finding it rather busy for the time of day. Viktor keeping himself close to Yuuri, their arms constantly brushing against one another while they talked. 

The warmth from Viktor was welcomed to Yuuri, his cheeks soft with embarrassment as they passed by each booth, looking out for familiar words that they would recognize. “I see something that looks like Russian Viktor.” Yuuri pointed towards the end of the long line of booths just before it turned down onto another street. “Oh, that one on the end?” Yuuri nodded, Viktor squinting for a moment, “Hm, nope close though.” He laughed, “That’s in Bulgarian I believe? It is Slavic though.” Yuuri hummed in slight disappointment, seeing that they hadn’t even walked by anything close to Japanese yet. Though, Chinese had been one of the first booths due to its popularity in the U.S, he hadn’t seen anything else remotely related to his culture. “Maybe it will be down that way then? The beginning of Slavic food?” Yuuri asked, “Maybe! I wonder if Japan is there too, so far all there is, is U.S, Canada and Mexico.” Viktor pouted slightly, “They are the most popular.” Yuuri admitted, “You are right Yuuri, we should stop on the way out and try some desserts from Canada and Mexico. I’ve never been to either place.” Yuuri was the same way, “Yeah! We’ll pick up some snacks.” He had to remind himself not to gorge himself on Katsudon if it was around. Last thing he needed was to explode on this date. Plus, he wanted to enjoy food with Viktor the entire time. If he was to full, he might just want to go home and sleep it off.

They made their way down the main street, taking a right at the Bulgarian stand before coming face to face with the Russian stand. “There it is!” Viktor threw his hands up into the air, Yuuri instantly laughing as the man practically ran towards the stall, Yuuri quickly following him. “Hi!” Viktor called, just before slipping into Russian. _”Hello! I have been looking for you! I have been homesick for some piroshki!”_ Viktor spoke quickly, an older woman standing on the other side of the wooden counter, fryers and grills behind her back while a man quickly cooked food. _”We are glad you found us! Where are you from?”_ The old woman asked in curiosity, _”St. Petersburg.”_ Viktor nodded, the woman gasping before quickly speaking again. Yuuri watching as the two interacted. If Yuuri liked Viktor’s accent… he absolutely loved it when he spoke his first language. The way his tongue moved, and he moved his hair from his face as he spoke. Looking for relaxed, less taxed as he thought of more complicated words. He smiled, Viktor looking over at him before gesturing towards him. “E-Eh?” He came from his thoughts, looking towards the woman as Viktor continued to speak. _”I am on my first date with this man! He is very sweet and told me about this place, isn’t he just the sweetest?_ The old woman laughed before nodding and agreeing, “W-What are you talking about?” Yuuri found himself asking, Viktor clearing his throat. “I told her you were very sweet for bringing me here.” He grinned childishly, Yuuri sputtering words, “I am not s-sweet!” He mumbled, he looked away from the older man, listening to his warm laughter before continuing off in Russian. 

“I ordered the piroshki, she said it will only be a few minutes.” Viktor spoke, reaching into his pocket for money. “O-Oh! I got it Viktor,” He reached for his own pocket, “No, no, I want to pay Yuuri. You brought me here, it is the least I can do.” The man insisted, already taking out the money and paying the older woman before Yuuri could make any further complaints. Viktor took a step back, pocketing his change before slipping his hands into his pockets. “I’m so excited Yuuri, I hope you like it!” Yuuri nodded, “You are very quiet Yuuri. Are you not excited?” Viktor asked suddenly, “Or is this how you express yourself?” The other was taken back by the sudden question, finding himself humming and unsure of how to answer. “I… I do get excited over things I just… I’m just enjoying the sight of seeing you so excited.” He admitted, his eyebrows furrowed together in concentration before looking back up at the other. Yuuri was surprised to see a faint blush on the man’s cheeks, swallowing dryly before his hand slid back into his hair.

“Thank you. That is… very flattering Yuuri.” He found his heart pounding suddenly, enjoying this new expression. Fingers slid against his wrist suddenly, Yuuri gasping as fingers laced into his. Viktor still looking rather flustered before he smiled sweetly. “Is this alright?” He questioned, Yuuri nodding before Viktor’s name was called out, a bag of food held out towards him from the Russian food. _”Thank you very much!”_ He spoke, bowing his head slightly before taking the bag of food with his free hand, looking towards Yuuri. “Here, here Yuuri,” He held the bag out to Yuuri, the male reaching in with his own free hand and grabbing a hold of the meat bun, finding it hot against his fingertips before he breathed in the lovely smell. 

He took a soft bite, his cheek tingling at the burst of flavor before his eyes gleamed happily. “This is amazing!” He spoke, his mouth still full before he swallowed, “It reminds me of nikuman! It is a lot like this, but steamed.” He explained, finishing off the bun quickly before taking the bag from Viktor’s hand, “Here you have some!” He explained, feeling rather excited to see Viktor’s reaction.

“There is the excitement!” Viktor grabbed one of the buns, his cheeks bright red as he took his first bit, moaning briefly as he closed his eyes. “It reminds me of home. Amazing!” He exclaimed, squeezing Yuuri’s hand tightly. The two, took turns munching at the buns, still holding hands and looking at one another. Smiling playfully, and occasionally burning their tongues on the hot food. 

When they finished the piroshki, Viktor threw away the bag in a nearby trash can, thanking the old woman once more before turning his attention back to Yuuri. “Now we continue the search for the Japanese stand!” The two walked through the chilling air, occasionally stopping and staring at the grills cooking away. They passed more slavic stands, moving closer to Korean and Vietnamese food before Yuuri finally caught the scent of the ever familiar taiyaki had always ate during festivals. He gasped before pointing towards one of the last stands, “There!” He rushed over, pulling Viktor along with him before happily greeting the man behind the counter. The man responded in Japanese, Yuuri feeling his heart flutter with familiarity. _”Hi! We were looking for you. I was wondering if you had Katsudon?”_ He asked hopefully, the man sadly shaking his head. _”No, there isn’t much room here. We only have Taiyaki, Crepes, and takoyaki.”_ Yuuri pouted slightly, he did enjoy all of those foods, but he was really looking forward to tasting his favorite once again.

_”That’s alright, one moment please.”_ Yuuri looked towards Viktor, “Which do you want to try Viktor? There’s crepes, Taiyaki, which is a pastry filled with chocolate or cheese, or even red bean paste. Or they have takoyaki too, that’s a small pancake with octopus in the middle.” Yuuri explained, Viktor humming softly, “They all sound wonderful! Why don’t you pick Yuuri?” The Japanese man wasn’t entirely sure what he was even in the mood for. It had been a while for all of them after all. He looked back towards the stall, taking in the sweet smell of sweetness. “Let’s have crepes, since we already ate something with meat?” Viktor nodded happily, “I haven’t had a crepe in a long time either.” After ordering the crepes, the two males stood off on the side. Still holding hands, Yuuri feeling a little disappointed. Viktor catching on to his lack of smile. “Yuuri? Is something wrong?” He asked, Yuuri shaking his head. “No, i’m sorry Viktor. I’m just a little sad that they didn’t have my favorite food here. It makes me a little home sick.” He admitted, Viktor looking towards the stand briefly before turning his attention back to the other.

“Right, it was the kats...kats...?” He attempted to recall the word, Viktor having trouble recalling the pronunciation. “It’s called Katsudon.” Yuuri laughed, Viktor looking slightly embarrassed, “What was in it again?” He questioned, Yuuri happy to explain it once again, “It’s fried pork-cutlet, with egg on rice. It has vegetables too! It’s amazing! I would always eat it if I did good on a test for school. But there isn’t very many places who sell it in the U.S.” Yuuri explained, “My mom makes the best katsudon! We’re famous for it in my home town, because we own a onsen, and many people buy it.” Yuuri continued, realizing that this was the first time he had talked for so long. At first he thought he should slow down. But Viktor gazed upon him in complete interest, enjoying the sound of his voice. “An onsen! I have only see those on t.v shows.” He replied, “What’s it like living at one?” Viktor asked, Yuuri continuing on about how convenient it was whenever he was overly stressed. That all he had to do was soak in the onsen. Viktor continued to listen, even after they grabbed their crepes and walked down the street along the stalls. 

Yuuri realized that no one had ever really listened to him this long before. It was nice… having someone actually willing to listen to him. Phichit did listen of course, but this felt different in some way. As he talked, Viktor took in every word, asking him genuine questions about where he grew up and Japanese traditions that Yuuri gave up when he came to the U.S. “What did you do for fun in Japan?” Viktor asked, finishing off his crepe and licking his lips. “Hm… I always hung out with my best friend Yuko at the ice rink. I was in ballet as well.” Yuuri admitted. He wasn’t that great at either sport, but he did join a few local competitions in the town and he won the majority of them. “Really?!” Viktor shouted suddenly, “I love ice skating! I used to do it all the time in Russia!” Viktor exclaimed, “It was my favorite thing to do!” Yuuri recalled the city’s ice rink, “There’s an ice rink here in the city! I could tell you where it’s at.” Viktor’s eyes gleamed with over excitement, “Yuuri, we should go ice skating! You and I!” Viktor quickly pulled his phone from his pocket, “When does the rink close?” He asked, “They close at eleven.” Viktor’s shoulders hung slightly, “It’s ten thirty already. We would never make it in time.” He looked incredibly disappointed. The two men standing at the entrance of the bazaar, the stalls beginning to close. 

“Yuuri. If you had fun tonight. Would you like to go skating with me on another night?” He asked, his smile looking incredibly soft and sweet to Yuuri. His cheeks burned slightly, “If you aren’t bothered by me.” Yuuri replied, Viktor slipping his fingers against the man’s wrist, stepping closer to him. “Bothered? I had a wonderful time Yuuri.” Viktor explained, leaning forward slightly. “I would love to have a second date.” He smiled again, Yuuri’s heart pounding wildly as the man leaned closer, his lips pressing against his cheek softly. 

Yuuri’s breath caught in his throat, his eyes closing before the lips move to his own mouth. Holding them together for a brief moment. Yuuri questioning his own body. What if his breath was bad? He did it sugary food. What if his lips were dry? He whimpered slightly, was he supposed to grab onto Viktor? Should he step closer? He shivered, the lips pulling away and Yuuri keeping his eyes squeezed shut. “Yuuri?” Viktor laughed softly, creating another shiver down his spine. His elegant fingers playfully rubbing his wrist. “You look absolutely gorgeous. Do you know that?” Yuuri shook his head, finally opening his eyes. “I’m not. I’m just…” He didn’t want to say that he was some generic nerd. Or some plain foreign kid, he wanted to be confident. But a man like Viktor, tall, beautiful, ice blue eyes and alluring accent. How could he compare to such a person? “But you are. This was a wonderful night, with a wonderful person.” He smiled at Yuuri, looking a little disappointed with his lack of confidence before he kissed Yuuri’s forehead. “I hope the kiss was alright.” He mumbled, “It was wonderful.” Yuuri mumbled quietly, his lips still tingling. “I’m glad you liked it.” Viktor laughed softly again.

“Would you like me to take you home in a taxi Yuuri?” Viktor asked, taking a step back from the other, but still holding onto his wrist. “You’re not really familiar with city though. You might get lost on your way home. How about I take you home first?” Yuuri asked, Viktor idolizing the sweet smile he gave. “Sounds good to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> //zombies in and lays on the floor  
> I am so sleepy ;n; I wanted to update more frequently  
> But one of my co-workers went on emergency leave and now im taking over her shifts.  
> I just want to write about cute boys ;n;
> 
> I'm sure i'll keep up with a weekly update. But if I stop updating suddenly, it's because I'm working and making that paper<3


	4. chapter four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second date where the two boys go to a local bar after Yuuri's class ends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't update in so long, and if it's written badly. I've had some bad things happen lately and I'm not really feeling one hundred percent. But writing makes me feel a little better! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

His lips were still tingling when he got home that night. His chest bubbling as he practically skipped across his living room. He kissed Viktor. It was pure and chaste, and the other man was warm against him. He wondered how nice it would be if Yuuri had the confidence to cup his cheek. Nibble on his lip and slip a tongue inside. The things he longed to do when it came to intimacy. It was laughable however. Yuuri had never been in a relationship before. He had his brief fantasies, such as the elegant fingers that belonged to Viktor. A few moments where he thought to himself about ‘climbing a tree,’ but all of them were over his head. He smiled before settling on his couch, tugging off his shoes. Wanting intimacy, desiring a person, but also feeling terrified of becoming to close to another human being. It was a curse to someone with horrible anxiety like himself. He closed his eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath before his phone went off. He hummed to himself quietly before taking a look at the text message.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
I had so much fun today!   
Thanks for taking me Yuuri (•◡•) **

Yuuri smiled, wondering how Viktor can act so normal, despite their kiss. 

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Same! Thank you for asking me to take you hehe**

He felt a little more relaxed with the simple text message, though he felt a strange itch at the back of his head. He wasn’t the best kisser, he could tell simply because he never exactly… kissed anyone before Viktor. He cleared his throat. Maybe he had kissed his best friend when they were six years old, but he wasn’t sure he could count that. Yuuri slouched onto his couch, pulling his feet up and laying back. His phone lying on his chest. His phone went off again, Yuuri wondering if the other was tired, since he didn’t get any sleep the night before.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
I enjoyed the kiss as well ~(˘▾˘~)  
I hope you let me do it again!**

Yuuri coughed, nearly choking as he sat up, his phone falling into his lap as his face burned up to his ears. How could that man enjoy something so simple? Yuuri was probably terrible at it. His lips were most likely chapped, his body was stiff, there was no way Viktor could ever enjoy something like that. He frowned, staring at his phone, his stomach twisting violently as he tried to ignore the horrible anxiety before he forced himself to reply.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
I’m not the best kisser.  
I’m sorry.**

He frowned, forcing himself from the couch and walked sluggishly to his room, pulling off his shirt and pants and went to his dresser. Yuuri tossed his phone onto his bed, just as it chimed again, the other feeling guilty for not responding right away. Deciding to get dressed first and crawled into bed. Grabbing his phone, he settled into his pillows before reading the message.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Sorry? Why? I enjoyed it!  
Yuuri, I truly enjoyed our night.  
Kissing you was the best thing  
That has happened to me  
Since i came to the U.S**

His stomach churned. A different type of twist however, the same giddiness returned suddenly. His lips pressing together, before he smiled slightly. His anxiety was trying to ruin everything… somehow it wanted to ruin everything for him. He closed his eyes briefly, taking in a deep breath.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Thank you for saying that.  
I’m sorry but… I have some  
Anxiety issues, and they make me  
Feel insecure. I really liked the kiss  
And meeting you has made happier  
Than I have been in a long time.**

\--x--

Yuuri wasn’t paying attention in class. He had trouble concentrating, and also felt so exhausted that he was sure that he was going to fall asleep. The night before had been another evening of constant texting between him and Viktor. It got to the point that Yuuri fell asleep attempting to send a last message. The man reading it that morning and only found a collection of letters that made little sense. Thankfully he hadn’t pressed send and was welcomed with a lovely ‘sweet dreams’ from Viktor. It warmed his heart and drove him through most of his school day. At least until one of the more boring classes took over whatever joy he had. Physics was not his best subject, in fact, he often had trouble in anything involving math and science and was more specialized in the arts. He sighed unhappily as he sat in his chair, the professor droning on about the notes.

His lips were tingling in thoughts about the kiss. The encouragement from Viktor helped ease the anxiety and now he was dwelling on when he could kiss the man again. He licked his lips before pulling out his phone, setting it on his thigh before sending the text.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Sorry I fell asleep last night!  
I woke up with my phone in my hand  
And everything!**

He made sure to turn his phone on vibrate before looking up at the professor. The other students taking notes and listening intently to the lecture. He might regret this later when it came to the next test, but he couldn’t help but want to talk to the man again. He couldn’t even withhold his smile as his phone went off. Quietly vibrating against his leg before Yuuri opened the message.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
It’s okay!   
I hope you’re not to tired!  
I went to get coffee and I was so sad  
You weren’t there ಥ_ಥ**

Yuuri cringed slightly, he had forgotten to mention that he had school today. He felt slightly guilty about not mentioning it to Viktor. Imagining the disappointment he felt when he walked into the coffee house and was greeted by Phichit or April. 

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Sorry!  
I forgot to mention I have school today  
I promise to make you coffee tomorrow!**

Or a kiss might make up for things. He withheld his own giggle before he bit into his lip. He hoped that Viktor wasn’t to upset about him not being around.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Don’t apologize!   
I just miss your smile!**

Yuuri set himself to reply, only to receive another message a moment later.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Plus maybe I wanted another kiss (◕‿ ◕✿)  
But I can settle for Makkachin’s smooches**

Yuuri tilted his head slightly, feeling insecure for a brief moment before another message came in. Yuuri coming face to face with an adorable picture of a brown poodle. He was looking towards the camera, his tongue hanging out. It’s body sprawled out on the floor, begging for its belly to be rubbed. It reminded Yuuri exactly of a dog that he had when he was younger. He smiled at the thought, Viktor owned a poodle, and Yuuri owned a miniature poodle when he was younger! The coincidence was amazing.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
Omg! What a cutie!  
I had a miniature poodle when I was younger!  
So his name is Makkachin! That’s adorable!**

He wished he still had pictures of his old dog to send to Viktor. A little sad that he hadn’t had his current cell phone at the time to keep the pictures on hand. He most likely had some at home in storage that he brought from Japan. Still, it was a little sad to be reminded of his childhood pet. Despite how adorable Makkachin was. Viktor sent more pictures of his dog however, bringing the smile back to Yuuri’s face while he received endless texts about how wonderful the animal was. Makkachin was a well behaved dog that enjoyed cuddling. He slept next to Viktor every night, and the two often held onto one another. Viktor admitted that it was only awful during summer time when Makkachin would lay on top of him. Yuuri could only imagine how horrible that would be, all that fur laying on his bed. 

Viktor’s energy was admirable, even though he must be exhausted. Yuuri couldn’t help but smile sweetly at the thought of seeing him smile and laugh again. 

Before Yuuri knew it, the class had ended, and Viktor had settled from his spam of dog pictures before admitting that he had finished work early. 

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
When are you out of class?**

Sadly, Yuuri had one more class to go. It was a late one, that ran till nine in the evening and Yuuri debated on ditching. However, with how he ignored his last class, he didn’t want to fall too far behind. 

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
I have one more class.   
I get out at 9**

He sent the text before moving onto his next class, most of the students disappearing and heading home as the sun began to set. He yawned, exhaustion weighing on his shoulders. Part of him really wanted to skip and sleep. But he was sure that if he was texting Viktor he would just stay up late once again. 

He walked quickly into his next class, taking a seat in the back as he pulled out his notebook. He felt his phone go off and he couldn’t help but feel the need to respond as soon as he could.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
That is so late!  
Aren’t you afraid to walk home that late?!  
Yuuri that’s how people get robbed! **

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
It’s alright I do it all the time!**

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
No it isn’t! That worries me!  
I have been told  
That the most dangerous place  
Is a College Campus at night.**

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
That’s for women.**

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Still! You should take a taxi home  
Or… Yuuri can I meet you at school  
And walk you home?**

Yuuri felt his heart jump at the offer, the class had long since started and he couldn’t help but feel a little ashamed in his lack of concentration. He looked up at his Professor, staring a board of notes he felt completely confused about. Thankfully, Phichit had the same class on a different day. So he could always borrow the notes. But it was still a little taxing to ask. He pressed his lips together into a fine line. Looking down at the message.

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
You don’t have to  
I don’t want to bother you.**

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
You would never bother me.**

Yuuri agreed to having Viktor meet him at school. His ears burning red throughout the lecture. His mind drifting away from school work to finding himself doodling on his notebook. Drawing a dog, and a smaller picture of Viktor’s grinning face. He almost felt like a stupid school girl. But damn, he couldn’t help but think the businessman was an adorable man who was after his heart. A crush really, but he was honestly hoping that maybe he could mean something else.

Class dragged on. Yuuri eventually leaving a few minutes early so he could take a moment to breath. He took a few moments to relax outside in the chilling air, the breeze biting as his cheeks and turning them red as class released. He gulped as he sent a text to Viktor, letting him know that he was on his way. 

Yuuri walked faster than normal, excited to see the man as he passed others as they made their way to the bus stop and their cars. He spotted the older male in the parking lot, his hands tucked tightly into his pockets while he blew wisps of white puffs of air. Yuuri smiled before calling out to the other, the male turning around and waving. “Hey Yuuri! I got here a few minutes ago, we should hurry, I don’t want you getting to cold!” Yuuri spotted the man’s red cheeks, “Viktor! You were waiting, I’m sorry! You shouldn’t have come, your face is so red.” Yuuri expressed his concern, the Russian shrugging his shoulders. “I wanted to see you Yuuri. I had to come.” His sweet smile reminded Yuuri of their date the night before, his charm flowing from his lips. “L-Let’s go then.” Yuuri smiled shyly as he walked beside the other. The two leaving the parking lot in at a quick pace in order to escape the cold.

“I had no idea that your school was so close to my work and your work.” Viktor spoke, “I was sure it would be farther.” Yuuri laughed, “No, I made sure to find a place that’s close to both places. What about you?” Viktor hummed softly for a moment, “I live maybe… four blocks from the coffee shop? I was looking into the same things. I wanted a place close by so I wouldn’t have to walk far.” Yuuri shivered, pulling his scarf tighter around his neck as they walked closely. “Do you know any nice places near here Yuuri?” Viktor asked, Yuuri taking a moment to think about the surrounding area. He wasn’t the type to go out drinking with friends, and only him and Phichit hang out. He knew of a local grill that was rather good to eat at, and he had heard of a nice bar near by. But other than that, there wasn’t much to show Viktor. “I only know of a nice grill near by.” He admitted, “Sorry, I don’t get out much.” Yuuri apologized, “Me either! We should see new places together Yuuri. That grill you mentioned, is it nice there? I haven’t eaten today and I’m starving!” He was being enthusiastic again, Yuuri realizing that he had not had dinner yet. 

“Oh, it’s just a block away. I like it there, me and Phichit eat there occasionally.” Yuuri explained, “Oh, your co-worker right? He seems pretty fun to be around.” Viktor replied, “Yeah, he’s the first friend I made when I came to the U.S.” Viktor slid his hands out of his pockets and rubbed his hands together, “We should all hang out one day. I want to properly meet him as well. You should hang out with me and Chris as well, he’s quite the party.” Yuuri had the pleasure of talking to Chris on many occasions as his barista. He seemed like he was very fun to hang out with, though Yuuri suspected that he would exhaust him. “Yeah, sounds good to me.” He agreed anyway, shifting slightly uncomfortable by the thought of interacting with someone new. “Is something wrong Yuuri?” Viktor asked honestly, “O-Oh, i’m sorry. It’s just… I find it hard to socialize sometimes. It’s kind of exhausting to me.” The other hummed, “Sorry if that made you uncomfortable. I was just suggesting, we don’t have to do anything like that. Let’s just enjoy what’s happening tonight?” Viktor suggested, laughing nervously, “Sorry if I made things awkward.” Yuuri apologized, “No, no! I don’t want you uncomfortable!” Viktor shook his hands towards Yuuri. He looked slightly flustered, Viktor awkwardly staring at the shorter of the two. Yuuri deciding that he looked rather adorable when he was attempting to make up for his small insecurities.

“It’s alright,” Yuuri laughed, “The restaurant is just around the corner.” He pointed ahead, the two settling back into a comfortable walk.

American Bistro was a nice place, it seemed to be rather popular with college students, even if it was rather late, the two still had to wait ten minutes for a table. However, time passed by quickly, and the two were sitting down at their table and staring at their menus. After ordering, Yuuri shifted slightly, taking a sip of his water while Viktor looked at the drink menu. “Mind if I drink a beer? I haven’t had one in awhile.” He asked, Yuuri shaking his head, “Go ahead.” After getting his beer, Viktor took a sip, sighing happily, “Do you drink Yuuri?” Viktor asked, the other shaking his head, “No, I don’t drink to often. My friends tell me I go a little overboard.” He laughed awkwardly, “Oh…?” Viktor smiled playfully, “Are you the angry type? Or maybe the horny type?” Yuuri snorted, his cheeks turning red before he covered his face. Viktor laughed, leaning slightly over the table. “What? Look at your cute face!” Yuuri snorted again, peeking from behind his hands. “I… I don’t know!” He stated, “I was kidding Yuuri.” He laughed again, “I-I know that!” Yuuri dropped his hands, back onto the table. “You are too cute.” Viktor spoke again, a lovely jump in his stomach made Yuuri smile. “H-Have you looked in a mirror lately.” If anyone was cute, it had to be Viktor. His smile, and his laugh made Yuuri’s heart tighten. He wanted to kiss him again, feel his soft lips against his chapped ones. 

“Oh is that confidence I hear? I think I like it.” Viktor was being playful again, taking another drink of his beer. “You bring it in me I guess.” Yuuri was still smiling shyly, holding onto his soft giggle. “Oh? I think I like that.” Oh Yuuri wanted to kiss him again. He really wanted to hold him close, he wanted to slid his hands into his hair and kiss his cheek. He wondered if Viktor was the type to cup his cheek. Or if he was the kind of person to go weak in the knees from a single deep kiss.

As they ate, they continued to make small flirtatious comments to one another. Viktor’s cheeks pink from his beer. His voice was slightly higher in pitch when tipsy, his grin lopsided while he giggled at everything Yuuri said. The Japanese man was sure that he was going to have to call the man a cab, but by the time the bill was paid, the pinkness disappeared. He seemed more coherent as well, Viktor claiming to have a fast metabolism and never stayed tipsy for very long. 

The night air was cold, and it burned at their cheeks while they walked. Viktor wrapping an arm around the other male and insisted it was to keep warm. It was so domestic to Yuuri, the fluttering in his chest, the comfort he was given. It was something so new, and exciting, despite the anxiety in the back of his head. Their walk was leisure, despite the cold against their skin. Yuuri subconsciously leaning against Viktor, his eyes closing briefly before Viktor spoke. “Is your apartment on the next block?” He spoke softly, Yuuri nodding, feeling a little disappointed that he was almost home. “Do you know how I get home from here?” He asked, looking a little confused and cringing a little. “I live over on forty-third.” Yuuri hummed, leaning away from the other, “Forty-third… I think if you head down the street by my house and head towards forty-second it will be faster.” Yuuri explained, “Oh! So i’m closer then I thought! You’ll have to come over and meet my dog!” Viktor was becoming excited again, the two stopping at the corner just before Yuuri’s apartment complex. 

“Oh yeah! The pictures were super cute. I can’t wait to meet him!” Viktor pulled away, “You’ll love him, he’s super sweet, he loves giving kisses, ah, he’s the best.” He sighed happily, grinning before looking up towards the apartment. “By the way, this place seems pretty nice. When did you move in?” He asked out of curiosity. “Oh, about a year ago, I wanted to move in with Phichit, but he already has a roommate.” Yuuri explained, “I like it though. It’s decently priced at least.” Though he had to admit that he was lacking in extra funds because of it. Viktor hummed softly before slipping his fingers against Yuuri’s wrist. The mood suddenly changing from a simple conversation to something more romantic. 

Yuuri squeezed Viktor’s hand, hoping to gain a positive reaction before the hand was pulled upwards. Soft lips pressed against his fingertips, Yuuri’s cheeks blushing as Viktor smiled. Kissing each individual finger before he looked upwards. His eyes slightly hooded while he gazed at Yuuri. The Japanese male gasping softly before he was tugged closer. Viktor’s lips brushing against his own, soft and chaste, just like the first time. Yuuri’s eyebrows furrowed together before he stepped closer to the taller man. His hand clenching onto Viktor’s shoulder before pressing his mouth harder against the other.

The kiss was innocent. Yuuri wondering if he could attempt anything else, unsure of himself before an arm wrapped around his waist. He gasped against the lips, a tongue slipping against his teeth. It created a soft whine from Yuuri’s throat, a sudden rush of fear pressing against his stomach and chest. His cheeks tingled however, the feeling pleasurable as the tongue pressed against his lip. Viktor was silently asking for permission, Yuuri giving into him easily as a free hand slid into his dark hair. Yuuri moaned, jolting with surprise at the noise he created. He had never been kissed in this way before, the way the tongue slid against his own, forcing air from his nose and exhausting him. He couldn’t breath anymore, and the burn was pleasant, feeling a need to continue the kiss. 

Viktor’s hands slid against his back, Yuuri’s fingers still clenching against the material of his coat. Viktor’s coy fingers slid further down the man’s back, the elegant fingers that Yuuri had admired earlier pressed against his hip before he grasped onto the soft flesh of his ass. Yuuri jumping from the sudden contact and shoved himself back. He gasped, his eyes wide while he stared at Viktor, realizing that a string of saliva connected them, breaking a second later. He panted for air, Viktor stepping back and releasing the other male. “I-I’m sorry Yuuri. Was that too much? I just--” Yuuri shook his head, still trying to find words on the tip of his tongue. It had been so lovely. The kiss against his mouth, the tongue against his own. It was so fucking lovely. But he… Yuuri had never had this happen before. “I… I’m not used to it. I’m sorry Viktor, I shouldn’t have encouraged you, and then stop you… I--I--” Viktor cleared his throat, “No. I’m sorry Yuuri. I should have made sure it was okay with you.” Their cheeks were red, flustered from the pleasure and the embarrassment. 

“I… I’ve never done this before Viktor. I want to… I just… I’m not used to things like that.” Yuuri explained, his hand pressing against his on chest, trying to calm his heartbeat. “I understand Yuuri, I didn’t intend for you to be uncomfortable. I… I…” He hummed for a moment, “Even if I went a little far. I enjoyed the kiss Yuuri.” He cleared his throat again, Yuuri biting his lip. “I… I liked it too.” He managed to squeak out, “May we do this again then Yuuri? Not the kiss of course, I mean going out again. Though kissing would be something wonderful.” He admitted, smiling rather nervously, Yuuri wondering how he could let his anxiety go in order to feel the warmth against him again. “Yes. I would love too.” He mumbled quietly, “Do you forgive me for making you uncomfortable?” Yuuri nodded, “I just… have a lot of anxiety. I just… want to take it slow.” Viktor continued to smile, leaning forward and pressing his lips against Yuuri’s cheek. “Of course. I don’t mind.” He whispered against his skin, “I’ll watch you till you get inside okay?” He replied, Yuuri taking a brief moment before moving across the street and headed inside.

His heart still pounding with every step he took, the entire time in the elevator and even in his own apartment he could still feel his heart pound. The kiss was burning his skin still, his pants uncomfortable as he collapsed onto his couch. Looking upwards at the ceiling while he tried to remain calm. He had pushed the man away from him in sudden shock, despite the sexual attraction, and the need to be near the other. He sighed, feeling tears suddenly push against his eyes. Why couldn’t he… just take the kiss and enjoy it? He sighed, rolling onto his side. He had ruined everything. Viktor was probably never going to contact him again. Say goodbye to the charming smile in the morning. No more flirtatious text messages and sweet compliments. He groaned, letting the tears fall. Why did he have to ruin everything?

He sobbed quietly as time passed, minutes ticking by before his phone went off. His sleeve wiping away his tears before he looked at his phone.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Hey Yuuri! Look Makkachin says hi!**

Yuuri laughed at the picture, Viktor holding his phone up as he held his dog. Grinning happily while a tongue pressed against his cheek. How did he manage to make everything look perfectly okay? He smiled briefly before clearing his throat. 

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
You’re really not mad Viktor?**

He sent quickly, sighing while he tried to calm himself down. The response coming quickly.

**From Viktor Nikiforov  
Why would I be?  
Oh Yuuri, tonight was perfect  
I would only change your discomfort  
I’m sorry I got ahead of myself.  
If you let me kiss you again  
I would be so tender and sweet.**

His heart skipped from the words, his eyes red from tear before he pulled his phone to his chest. How was he supposed to respond to something as sweet as that?

**To Viktor Nikiforov  
I would love that.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anxiety is one of the worst things people face every day. It can lead to some serious issues, like keeping a person from going to work. Stopping them from forming meaningful relationships, and can cause them to hide themselves away from the world. However, one of the most tragic things about it, is that some people just simply accept this way of life. They don't actually see how it is destroying certain aspects of their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I was looking at apartments, and I think that I like this one for Viktor.
> 
> http://imgur.com/VWRPWeB
> 
> Also, sorry it took so long to post. I have been very busy lately, not only that I'm struggling with some stuff. So I haven't really been in the mood to write. Been more about playing Stardew Valley heheh.

Why was it so difficult to breath?

He could swear that the weight on his chest was slowly killing him. He rolled in his bed, whimpering to himself. It was times like this, he truly hated living alone, the need to be with someone was intense. He felt like he needed to talk to someone about what had happened. Even though Viktor had reassured him that things were okay. He had to make sure that they really were alright. He closed his eyes, cursing his horrible anxiety, and how the pressure always built up when he was alone. He needed a little tender, love and care, some time to spend with Phichit could help. But they both had work tomorrow, and he was sure that Phichit had class that night. He sighed, spreading out on his bed, his arms thrown out along the sheets while he tried to remain calm. 

He took deep breaths, focusing on the calming sensation in his belly. It was still difficult to breath however, and he wondered if he should just get up and do something productive. But it was late, Viktor had stopped responding to his texts, signaling that he had fallen asleep. He continued to take deep breathes throughout the night, attempting to sleep.

-x-

He felt awful. His head pounding while he walked to work, shivering as the breeze tore through his jacket. He should have just called off, and stayed home to recover from last night’s anxiety attack. Though calling off would make him feel ever worse. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place, but the thought of the shift going by quickly so he could go home and nap was on his mind. He could make it, he just needed a few extra shots to pull him through. He could already taste his morning latte when he walked into the shop, Phichit talking happily with April before looking over his shoulder. “Yuuri! Good morning!” He practically sang, April giving a soft wave. “I’ll start on the good morning latte.” Phichit grinned, “Mind giving me a extra shot? I’m going to need it.” Yuuri admitted, cringing slightly, “Oh my, you look awful!” April blurted out, Phichit laughing, “That was pretty rude,” The girl cleared her throat. “S-Sorry, but you look so tired Yuuri.” She admitted, the other shrugging his shoulders. “I’ve had better nights.” He stated before heading towards the back, rubbing his eyes while he tried to fight off the overwhelming sleep he felt. 

When he came out, ready for work, he quickly drank his coffee, sighing happily before smiling at his co-workers. “Thank you Phichit, I needed this.” Phichit responded with a ‘you’re welcome’ before a customer came in. The male taking care of their requests while Yuuri paid attention to April. “I am sorry Yuuri. I didn’t mean to insult you. Did something happen last night?” The other shook his head, not feeling comfortable enough to really bring up his anxiety issues with April. She was incredibly friendly, but he didn’t feel the need to express all of his feelings to her. He didn’t want to burden her with such things after all. He would prefer to discuss them with Phichit. “Sorry you’re having such a hard time.” She patted his shoulder, the male thanking her before she sighed.

“Well, I guess i’ll tell you both now. Ally called me the other day, and wants me to switch with someone on the evening shift. I guess one of the kids who was just hired can only work in the mornings because he goes to school.” She explained, “Oh dang, that sucks,” Phichit claimed, finishing off the drink he was making. “Yeah, I’ll have to see if my husband can pick up the kids from day care. But she said it will only be for a little while, at least until she hires someone else for that position. She was meaning to hire someone else for the mornings to stock the pastries while the rest of us handle the lines.” April continued to explain, Yuuri listening quietly before thinking about the new coworker. If he was a student, he wondered if they had any classes. Maybe Yuuri and Phichit knew him?

“Have you seen the new person? Are they nice?” April shrugged, “I think I briefly saw him? He looked like a cutie! A little young, but he looked sweet.” She explained, Yuuri humming in amusement before customers began to pile in through the door. “Oh yay, morning rush, best part of the day.” Phichit spoke sarcastically before the three went back to work.

The hour dragged on, and Yuuri felt the horrible pull in his stomach when he realized that it was nearly ten o’clock and Viktor had not come in yet. The line settled down, and he found himself frowning, staring at the door anxiously, wondering if he should send a text to see if the man was angry at him after all. The ability to breath was difficult again, and he felt the need to cry as he forced himself to clean out the pastry case. His hands shaking while he withheld his whimpering. He swallowed, finding his tongue dry as he looked up as the door opened. His vision mostly blocked by the food, but he could see the sides of black slacks, nicely pressed before hearing Phichit’s welcoming voice. “Hey, it’s our new favorite customer!” Yuuri jumped to his feet, spotting Viktor over the counter, the man looking surprised by his sudden appearance before he grinned. “Good morning!” Yuuri felt slight relief, “You’re pretty late today, are you off today?” Phichit asked out of curiosity. “Oh, no, I have work, I just had a meeting early this morning.” Yuuri noted the bags under the man’s eyes. He looked almost as tired as himself.

“So i’m here for a pick up, Yuuri, do you mind making my drink a double?” He asked, still smiling, looking as he always did. Yuuri nodded, unable to talk as his chest settled. Was he being awkward because of the kiss the previous night? What if Viktor didn’t have a meeting and he was avoiding him somehow? Such a foolish thing to think about. The man was here, didn’t that mean something?

“You look tired Yuuri, are you alright?” Viktor asked suddenly, looking concerned, “O-Oh, I couldn’t sleep last night.” He admitted, “Oh… was it because of me?” He asked, Phichit shooting a look towards the two, his eyes wide and curious. “N-no, nothing like that. I didn’t sleep after we finished **talking.** ” He emphasized the word talking before looking towards his best friend the other giving him a look of distaste before turning around. “Thank goodness! I didn’t want to keep you up. Maybe you should take a nap when you get home?” He suggested, “I’m really thinking about it…” Yuuri mumbled, closing his eyes for a few moments as the anxiety settled and he felt more comfortable. “What time are you off today?” Viktor asked curiously, “Oh, I’m off a little early, at two instead of five.” He opened his eyes, moving to finally start on Viktor’s drink, listening to the whirl of the steamed as he looked back at the beauty in front of the counter. “Do you think you’ll be up for some ice skating after you nap?” His smile looked a little more sheepish as he leaned against the counter. 

“Want to met up at five? Unless you want to leave later?” Yuuri’s heart was fluttering again, in a more positive manner. “I should be good by five, but what about you, you get off at five right?” Yuuri asked, “I actually get off early today as well! At three, so I can have a little nap before seeing you in cute skates.” He grinned again, Yuuri squeaking from the compliment. “I-I’m not…” He mumbled, looking down at the warm drink as he stirred everything together. “Yuuri~ Remember how adorable you are.” He leaned even further over the counter, “Especially after kissing you so sweetly.” Yuuri’s cheeks burned bright red before clearing his throat. “Y-You… looked pretty cute too.” He responded, Viktor laughing, “There it is! The confidence that I simply adore.” He was grinning, like a fool, or a child who was just caught doing something wrong. Yuuri was beginning to adore the mischievous look. “You… bring it out in me remember?” He smiled shyly, capping off the drink and handing it over. “Thank you beautiful, and here’s--” Viktor reached into his pocket fishing out the money before Yuuri waved his hand. “Oh no, it’s on the house.” He spoke suddenly, his mind taking a jump of its own.

“You don’t have to do that Yuuri.” Viktor spoke, insisting on paying. “No, no, you paid for dinner last night and walked me home. Let me buy you coffee for keeping you up at night.” The man presented a quiet smile, looking at the cup of coffee before nodding. “I enjoy talking to you all night Yuuri. Thank you for the kiss though.” He continued to give the charming smile before taking a sip of the drink. Yuuri’s cheeks burning slightly, “I think i’ll need a refill when we meet tonight though. Do you mind giving me a kiss later?” Yuuri wasn’t sure if he meant another drink or an actual kiss. “Um.. do you mean--” Viktor chuckled, “A real one would be nice. If that’s alright with you.” Yuuri could already feel Phichit’s gaze on his back. He could already see his best friends grin and wide eyes as he watched the two flirt. Yuuri bit his bottom lip, “It would be my pleasure.” He spoke, surprised that he did not stutter, watching Viktor’s eyes sparkle before he practically jumped into the air. “Really? My goodness, you are just too cute!” He laughed, “Let me see more of this confidence Yuuri, it will fuel me for the rest of the day!” Yuuri shook his head before bursting into laughter. “Did that extra shot already hit you? You’re being so loud now.” He continued to laugh, “I’m excited of course! I get to skate with you, and get a kiss? Isn’t that every Russian man’s dream?” Yuuri tried to withhold his laughter, but only managed to snort. “You are such a dork.” He laughed, Viktor still beaming, enjoying the sound of laughter.

“I enjoy making you laugh Yuuri.” He spoke, humming softly before listening to the painful ring of his phone. Reminding him it was time to return to work. He sighed unhappily, “That’s my signal to head out. I can’t wait to see you.” Yuuri continued to giggle away as he wished Viktor luck. His smile wide as Phichit and April practically slammed into him. “Oh my god, Yuuri. Yuuri~~!” Phichit grabbed onto Yuuri’s shoulders, practically shaking the man. “Kissing?! You’ve been kissing?!” He exclaimed, “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you text me? What happened?” Phichit demanded, the other’s face turning red. “Um… uh well it isn’t that big of a deal--” “--My best friend, whom I love more than anyone--might be getting some fine Russian ass soon, and he tells me it’s no big deal?” The male’s shoulders sank, his arms wrapping around Yuuri’s neck. April laughing, “Come on, Phichit… it’s… embarrassing.” He mumbled, the man looking up. “Why is it bad at it? Was his breath bad? Oh, is he like slobbery like a dog?” Phichit’s eyes narrowed, searching for the answer. “N-No! I mean, it was nice! R-Really nice, he…” He thought for a moment, “Well… I mean… his lips are soft, and it was so nice. But last night, we were kissing… and…” He wasn’t sure how to explain what had happened without making Viktor out to be the bad guy. 

“I encouraged him… but I wasn’t exactly ready. So I pushed him away.” He mumbled, Phichit relaxing his grip on his friend and giving him the space he seemed to need. “How did he react?” Phichit questioned, looking concerned, “He was okay with it. He insisted that everything was fine, but I can’t help but think that he dislikes me for it.” It sounded stupid, despite the flirting that had just occurred. “I think he isn’t holding anything against you Yuuri. I mean, he was so excited about seeing you! He even wants to kiss you again! I think he really likes you.” Phichit insisted, Yuuri shrugging his shoulders. “Hey Yuuri, it’s alright, people get insecure like that in their first relationship. But trust me, the way he was looking at you, i’m sure he likes you just the same.” April spoke very suddenly, patting Yuuri on the shoulder. “Just… relax, take a nap when you get home. Maybe smoke a joint,” Yuuri practically choked, “I don’t do that April.” He stated, the girl bursting into laughter, “Of course you don’t hun! Such a sweet baby.” She continued to laugh before she moved to help the next customer. 

“Don’t worry too much Yuuri. Like April said, just take a nap… scratch the weed though. Your pure heart probably can’t take it.” The man hummed in slight annoyance, no he would not be doing drugs. Even if it was something as small as weed. He was not the type to start such a habit, despite it being a joke. He only felt a little better about the situation.

-x-

He hadn’t slept. 

He tried to, but he only found himself staring up at his ceiling, his heart pounding in his ears while he thought about his situation. Relationships, were terrifying if one thought about it long enough. The idea of trusting another human being enough, to touch you, and to become intimate was incredible. Even when it came to simply talking about feelings and inner thoughts was something to be afraid of. He thought about calling the whole thing off. Tell Viktor he wasn’t interested anymore, delete his number and switch shifts. He would never have to see the beautiful man again. He would miss his smile, his accent and his goofy antics, but he would get over it he was sure. Despite how painful it was just thinking about it. Why did it have to be so damn difficult to open up about something so easy? Others did it. April dated many men before marrying her husband. Phichit had a few relationships as well. They made it seem so simple, easy, and enjoyable. So far Yuuri was just smothered whenever he was away from Viktor. 

He agonized for hours until it was time for him to get ready. Lacking the courage to end it all, he chose to speak to Viktor in person. His feet dragging as he made his way to the shop. Debating the entire way on whether or not he should simply run back home. But the moment he began to contemplate, Viktor was already calling out to him. Yuuri realizing that the man was early. His grin wide and happy as always. “Yuuri! Did you have a nice nap?” Viktor asked, tilting his head as he gazed at the slightly shorter male. 

The Japanese male attempted to smile only to find himself shivering instead. “What’s wrong Yuuri?” Viktor asked, the male pressing his lips together into a fine line before finally speaking. “Are you angry about last night?” Yuuri asked, “I… I don’t want things to be awkward, and I don’t want you to hate me.” Yuuri admitted, Viktor’s smile slowly disappearing. “Yuuri, I’m sorry I put you in such a position. I took a chance and it was a mistake. Not the kiss, but I should have went slower. I should have been gentle with you dear.” Yuuri nearly jumped at the pet name, his heart fluttering from the very word. “I enjoy spending time with you Yuuri, you make my day. I want to continue what we have, but I will go as slow as you need. It’s not a relationship unless both parties are happy yes?” Yuuri stared at the ground, feeling the traces of tear pushing at his eyes. His lack of sleep tearing at him before he nodded. Viktor reached for the man, his fingers pushing into the black strands, forcing them before Yuuri’s ear. “We’ve only had two dates you know.” He replied, “This is just the beginning. We don’t have to rush or anything like that.” Viktor continued to explain, Yuuri looking up before sniffling. “Please trust me Yuuri, I want to spend more time with you. I want to see you laugh like you did this morning. I want to see you excited like you were the other day. I want to know more about you, your life before the U.S, the normal things people want to know when they start a relationship. What about you?” Viktor asked, his fingers lingering in Yuuri’s hair.

“I… I want to learn more about you too. Having fun and hearing you laugh, that sounds so amazing. But… I’m sorry I struggle with these horrible thoughts. I’m insecure about a lot of things, so you might not want to--” “--I think that I can make my own decisions Yuuri. I choose to spend time with you. I have fun with you, I can laugh, and feel relaxed. If you feel insecure, tell me and i’ll try to ease your fears. But please don’t make it seem like i’m forced into this position.” Yuuri stared down at his feet. “Do you still want to have go out with me tonight?” Viktor asked, the man looking up with a shy gaze. He had been looking forward to skating with Viktor for some time now. The other seem sincere as well. He pressed his lips together as he thought before finally speaking. “I want to go.” He mumbled quietly, Viktor grinning before taking a step closer towards the other. “Is it alright if I hug you?” He asked, “I’m the clingy type, so I love hugs.” He admitted, Yuuri thinking that the statement might be one of the cutest he has ever heard before he grinned. Yuuri laughed as he wrapped his arms around Viktor’s waist, the man returning the embrace. Yuuri taking a moment to dwell in the thought that Viktor was world’s greatest hugger. He was warm, and the way he wrapped his body around Yuuri’s felt perfect. Yuuri tucked his cold nose against the man’s shoulder, taking a deep breath and realizing that Viktor smelled amazing. He could get addicted to wonderful the man smelled. Wondering if he was wearing new cologne. He would have to ask him later, because this new scent was going to be the end of him.

-x-

The ice rink was colder than it was outside. The men grinning happily as they rented their skates, “I think I need to just buy a pair. These suck,” Viktor muttered as he tightened the laces, “Same here. I don’t come to often though, so I never thought about buying them before.” Even though Yuuri did miss skating. It had always been calming to him. Even the competitions didn’t make him as anxious as he thought they would. He was mostly into it because the movements calmed him. The sound of how the blades scraped the ice, sometimes he would find himself so immersed that he could spend hours at the rink by his house. Maybe he should consider getting back into it, since he had been so stressed lately. 

Yuuri wiggled his toes, making sure his feet were nice and secure while Viktor sat beside him. Ready to go and all smiles, “How often did you used to do this?” Viktor asked suddenly, “All the time back home. I was even in a few local competitions.” Yuuri explained, standing up, Viktor following behind him. The male still taller than him on the skates, “That’s a shame, I forgot that i’m shorter than you. I was going to be the same size if you didn’t have your skates.” Yuuri spoke, touching the top of his own head and guided it forward, his fingers tapped Viktor’s nose where his head would have met the other. “But seeing you shorter than me is just too good to be true.” Yuuri snorted, his fingers tapping Viktor’s forehead, “You dork.” He joked, Viktor continuing his playful grin. “Come on, let’s go,” Yuuri held his hand out, Viktor gladly taking it as they walked out of the locker rooms and towards the actual rink. A few people already skating around with their kids. “When you competed, what kind of jumps did you do?” Viktor asked as they stepped onto the ice. “Well I was a lot younger. So I did the basic jumps mostly, whenever I attempted quads I always ended up eating ice.” Yuuri laughed, “I had the same experience. I want to practice more, but when I got the job here, I kind of lost the need to skate.” The two glided onto the ice, slowly skating along the rim as a warm up. Enjoying the chill and laughter of people as they skated by, some of them struggling to keep their balance.

“Want to do some jumps with me?” Viktor asked suddenly, his hands in his pockets. Yuuri hummed, “I think if I tried anything I might fall on my face.” He laughed quietly, “I haven’t done any jumps in a long time.” He admitted, Viktor humming, “It doesn’t hurt to try. If I fall are you going to kiss me better?” Viktor asked playfully before picking up speed and racing ahead of Yuuri. The young man’s face flushed. “He’s so confident.” He muttered, watching Viktor skate across the ice. Viktor looked truly in sync when he was on the ice. His eyes briefly closing while he smiled. Yuuri’s heart pounding when he saw one of Viktor’s leg’s slip back, his body turning at an angle before he pushed off into a simple Toe Loop. It was such a simple jump, the male landed it perfectly. Still grinning as he skated past Yuuri. “I haven’t done that in forever, I was sure that I would fall.” He laughed, Yuuri looking over his shoulder as the man turned swiftly down the ice towards him. “Come on Yuuri! Try it, you can do one right?” Of course he could do a toe loop, it was one of the first jumps he had learned! He found himself feeling more confident as he picked up speed, following behind Viktor, the male still smiling. “Are you going to do it?” Viktor asked, Yuuri nodding before Viktor allowed the Japanese male to take the lead, the man turning around to face Viktor. His leg lifting before he took off into the loop. The landing felt foreign to Yuuri, the feeling was something he wasn’t used to. Not in skates that didn’t belong to him. But when he kept his balance and glided across the ice. Viktor quickly catching up, “You did it!” The two laughed, continuing to skate along the ice, doing simple jumps they recalled. Viktor touching the ice with his hand a few times, while Yuuri fell to his knee after another toe loop. His body feeling exhausted from the jumps. His skin burning as he picked himself off the ice, his knee already beginning to throb as Viktor came beside him. “Are you alright Yuuri?” Viktor asked, “I’m alright, I guess I went a little overboard. I’m not used to doing so many jumps.” He admitted, sweat pushing against his brow. “Maybe we should head out? You should ice your knee before it swells.” Yuuri winced as he applied pressure to his knee. Well, that would surely hurt every time he rolled out of bed for the next few weeks.

“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Yuuri clicked his tongue as the two men slid off the ice, Viktor helping the male put on his ice guards before taking him to the lockers to remove the skates. 

As they left the ice rink, Yuuri’s knee continued to throb. Thinking to himself on whether or not he had an ice pack at home. “I’ll get us a cab.” Viktor spoke, leaving Yuuri side in order to call them a cab by the street. Yuuri followed the other male. Maybe Viktor had an ice pack he could borrow until tomorrow? The male’s home was on the way to his own after all. Though, he didn’t want to give the male to much trouble. He didn’t exactly want the night to end just yet. They had so much fun, until their cheeks were red, and Yuuri’s jaw was sore from grinning the entire time. Viktor looked so good when he skated, like he was born to be there. He had never seen someone so happy before. Somehow, just seeing it, gave Yuuri great joy. 

He watched Viktor quietly as he called a cab, the male looking over his shoulder before gesturing for Yuuri to hurry up. The male complying before getting into the cab, Viktor following behind him. “Hey… Viktor?” Yuuri spoke quietly, “Yes?” Viktor hummed happily, “I was wondering… do you have an ice pack I can borrow until tomorrow?” He asked, Viktor humming, “I sure do! Do you want to come over for a bit? Makkachin would love to meet you!” Viktor spoke, Yuuri feeling his stomach curl at the thought of going over to a new place. Normally he was more comfortable if he had someone close to him come with him to a new place. However, he had fun with Viktor. He laughed, and felt more comfortable with him than he had with anyone in a long time. “Sure.” He found himself speaking quickly. “You’ll love Makkachin, he’s just the sweetest. When I brought him from Russia I was so happy to have my best friend back. We were apart for like a week and I was so lonely while I slept.” Viktor explained, talking lovingly the entire ride to his home about his beloved dog. Yuuri happily listening to him, his hand tenderly rubbing his own knee.

When they arrived at the apartment complex, Viktor helped Yuuri from the car. The younger male wincing as he walked. He could tell that it was swollen already, in dire need of some TLC. Thankfully, the apartment complex had an elevator, Viktor quickly pressing the button for the fifth floor. “I’ll just go first so he jumps on me. I don’t want him to hit your knee.” Viktor explained, Yuuri nodding as he followed the man down the hallway. Passing by doors for other apartments before stopping at the last one down the hall. Yuuri feeling his stomach twist in anticipation as the male reached into his pocket and grabbed onto his keys. He unlocked the door, Yuuri hearing the sound of a dog crying from the other side before Viktor slipped inside. “Give me one second.” He breathed as he entered, calling out suddenly. “Makka!” He laughed, Yuuri only imagining the cute scene behind the almost closed door. “I missed you too! Good boy!” Viktor laughed, pushing the door open, Yuuri was faced with one of the cutest things he had ever seen. 

Viktor was sitting on the floor, a large poodle laying on top of him, crying as he rubbed his face over Viktor’s. His tail wagged happily as he drooled and licked his master, his ears perking at the sight of Yuuri. “Okay, be good Makka, don’t scare him away.” As if Yuuri could be afraid of such a beautiful dog. The dog tumbled towards Yuuri, the male kneeling down on his good knee. His hands scrubbing at the dog’s face while he licked at his hands. Yuuri laughed, “Aw, you’re just too cute.” He complimented, the dog forcing his way to Yuuri’s face, licking his cheek and neck while the man continued to laugh. “Alright, alright, Makka come on, i’m supposed to be the one giving kisses.” Viktor laughed, grabbing his dog’s collar and tugging him off of the male. “I don’t mind, he looks like my dog back home. Makes me miss him.” Yuuri admits, standing up and watching Viktor step onto tile, Yuuri happily following him. The tile was a part of the kitchen, which lay to the male’s right, the room opening up to the living room. Nicely decorated, Yuuri wondered how the man had time to actually take the time to make his place look nice. 

Yuuri’s apartment looked like something from the penny saver. His walls clashed, he lacked theme and he had gotten everything from yard sales or from classmates who needed to get rid of furniture. Yuuri found this apartment rather impressive, Viktor releasing Makkachin and allowing the dog to run about the apartment. “Go ahead and take a seat on the couch, i’ll grab the ice pack.” Viktor spoke, pointing to the couch, before heading into the kitchen. Yuuri complied, heading towards the couch and taking a seat. His nerves on edge while he tried to calm the way his heart was pounding. Part of him thought that he had made a mistake. That he should have just went home, forget about the ice pack and just take some advil. He pressed his lips together tightly, listening to Viktor shift around the kitchen. Makkachin panting loudly before coming over to Yuuri. He sniffed at the boy’s pants, licking the material on the occasion before settling his head on the man’s good knee.

Yuuri smiled, staring at the friendly eyes as he gently scratched behind his ears. “Good boy.” Yuuri mumbled, the dog climbing onto the couch beside him, settling his head against Yuuri’s shoulder. “You sure are friendly.” He laughed, Viktor coming into the living room. “Here we go, i’ll bring the coffee table closer for you.” Viktor set an ice pack onto the coffee table in front of the couch, tugging it closer before reaching to grab a pillow from the couch and set it on top. “Alright, let’s put that knee up.” Yuuri complied, smiling as the male took his ankle gently. A shiver running down his spine as his shoe was slid off. “You don--” He squeaked, Viktor moving his foot on top of the pillow before setting the ice pack on top of Yuuri’s knee. The pants keeping the burning sensation at bay. “Want to watch a movie?” Viktor asked, Yuuri still recovering from the gentle handling before he nodded. “Awesome! What kind do you want to watch?” He turned around, grabbing the remote before settling on the opposite side of Makkachin. “I have netflix and hulu, so we have a bunch to pick from.” Viktor explained, turning on the t.v that stood against the wall across the living room. 

Viktor turned on the television, the two falling into small talk as they settled into watching a random movie they decided on. Yuuri petting Makkachin’s head, while Viktor reached to rub the dog’s back. “He reminds me so much of my dog.” Yuuri explained, Viktor looking over at Yuuri. “What’s your dog’s name?” He asked, “Vicchan.” He smiled, “I’ll ask my mom to send a picture next time I talk to her.” He explained, “How are you parents?” Viktor questioned suddenly, “Did you have a good relationship with them?” Yuuri hummed, “Yeah, my mom and me were close. Dad and I are good as well, but mom and me have always gotten along really well. I guess my dad and sister are more inclined to hang out.” He explained, “Oh, what’s your sister’s name?” Viktor asked, “Mari,” He explained, “Did you two go to school together? Or is she much older?” Yuuri found himself focusing on Makkachin’s gaze again. “We went to school for one year together.” When he was much younger, they shared the same school, but she was old enough that by the time he moved up to a different school, she had already surpassed him. 

“School isn’t a very pleasant memory.” He spoke without thinking, Viktor tilting his head. Yuuri quickly realizing what he had said. “Oh sorry, that was way too much information.” Talking about your feelings and your dark experiences was a one way to ticket to being hated. The problem with human beings, that Yuuri realized was that they were more concerned with themselves then they were with others. If one person talked about a bad experience, it always opened the door to being belittled. The very common phrase was, “Oh well, I had this happen, and it was awful.” To be honest, Yuuri hardly cared about other people’s problems, because he was sure that most people had trouble sleeping at night. “No it’s okay Yuuri. I don’t mind if you talk to me.” Viktor spoke suddenly, surprising Yuuri. “Why was school so horrible? Were you bullied?” That was an understatement. The horrible memories that lead to his anxiety haunted him on many occasions. It wasn’t something he exactly wanted to talk about.

“I don’t want to get into it.” He stated, “Sorry.” Viktor quickly spoke, “It’s alright, I just dislike talking about it.” He explained, smiling as Viktor shifted, trying not to seem nervous. “We’ll just say that… it kind of lead me to be anxious a lot.” He thought about mentioning the depression, but he wasn’t sure if he could really admit that yet. “...Can I ask about it? The anxiety.” Makkachin shifted, sliding off of the couch and headed towards the kitchen. The sound of him drinking water taking over the air, along with the movie on the t.v. “I don’t want to ruin the night.” Yuuri replied, settling back into the couch. “You won’t ruin the night. I’m just concerned to be honest. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable again. So… i’m hoping to understand it better. If that makes sense.” Viktor explained, shifting so he was turned on the couch, his knee sliding up to prop his body up better. 

Yuuri shrugged, “I just… I don’t know. Sometimes I just feel overstimulated by everything. New things kind of make me uncomfortable. That’s why I was so weird the night before. I’m not used to all those sensations so…” He spoke slowly, his cheeks slightly red as he admitted his flaws. “Does work ever become like that?” Viktor asked, Yuuri nodding, “Yeah. Sometimes when there’s a huge line and someone is yelling I just… I just need to take a second in the back. Nothing too bad, I mean i’ve had anxiety attacks at work before. But not enough to make me leave early.” Viktor hummed, his eyebrows furrowed together in concern. “I’m sorry I made you feel that way.” He apologized again, “I didn’t know I made you feel so uncomfortable. I’ve never felt that way before, so I just… it was selfish of me.” Yuuri smiled, “It’s not your fault. It wasn’t like… I felt bad. I love the feeling, I was just overwhelmed. I told you… i’m okay with it. We just need to be… slow.” Yuuri explained, Viktor gently taking Yuuri’s hand. “Just tell me what to do.” He closed his eyes, smiling Yuuri tilting his head while he stared at the Russian beauty. He slid closer along the couch, gently pressing his lips against Viktor’s. 

He dwelled on the warm sensation, pulling away before reuniting their mouths. Tiny pecks as he settled closer to Viktor. The male softly reaching for Yuuri, his free hand sliding against Yuuri’s cheek before they parted. “Yuuri, is it alright if I hold you closer?” He asked softly, a shiver running down Yuuri’s back before he nodded. Viktor released the man’s hand wrapping an arm around Yuuri, pulling him closer to his lap before they kissed again. Still soft and innocent, Viktor waited patiently, Yuuri’s heart pounding continuously. He thought about how wonderful his hips felt when Viktor’s tongue slid against his lips. Wondering what if they could do it again. His arms felt relaxed, his fingers toying with Viktor’s shirt. Yuuri opened his mouth slightly, his tongue tenderly sliding out, sliding along Viktor’s bottom lip. He listened to the male gasp, the thumb against his cheek rubbed the skin tenderly. 

They parted again, their cheeks a soft pink before Viktor smiled. “Are you sure that’s okay?” He asked, Yuuri shrugging, “I thought that last time it felt good. I think the grabbing is what startled me.” He explained, one of his hands slid up Viktor’s chest, settling against his neck. “C-Can I touch your hair?” Yuuri asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Viktor flashed that charming smile that left Yuuri’s stomach twisting happily. “Of course.” A thumb and forefinger grabbed onto the ashy strands, rubbing the hair and finding it soft before he carded his fingers into the ash. He smiled, feeling his confidence grow as he leaned in for another kiss. Viktor slipping his tongue against Yuuri’s upper lip. Playfully touching him before parting with a smile. “You are just… adorable.” Viktor breathed, Yuuri shivering. “Can I do it again?” Viktor asked, Yuuri nodding, as the tongue returned. Running along his lips before pressing forward, gaining access to the man’s mouth. The tongue curled against Yuuri’s teeth, playfully rubbing the roof of Yuuri’s mouth and creating a sudden intake of breath. 

Yuuri’s heart throbbed as he squirmed, the roof of his mouth extremely sensitive. The tongue still toying with him before it slipped back. Their mouths parted, a string of saliva connecting the two men before breaking a second later. 

Yuuri panted, shivering before Viktor leaned against him, his forehead pressing against the other’s shoulder. “Hey, um… do you want to hang out again? When you’re free?” He asked, still smiling happily. Yuuri nodded, pressing his lips against Viktor’s temple. “Thank you for… listening to me.” He breathed, Viktor happily humming. “Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is interested, you can leave me suggestions! This includes, kinks, angsty needs, or future plots! Also, if you enjoy my writing style, look into my other stories c:
> 
> You can also talk to me on my tumblr if you're looking for a friend!
> 
> User: Invisible-Spaz  
> Be warned for the overwhelming yaoi though. I'm a pervert.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri is currently in a low point of his depression and anxiety. He needs a break, but he can't find himself the time, nor can he relax. Finally all of the stress he is under forces him to cave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Took some time to write, thanks to work. But thank you to everyone for your support!  
> If anyone has any recommendations on what to do next please let me know!

Chapter Six

There was something nice about patterns Yuuri realized. The job he felt and the high he got from the lack of anxiety. It was still there, but he found himself comfortable with Viktor now. Yuuri making Viktor his usual cup of coffee, sending him texts throughout the day before Viktor came to pick him up after work or school. The two walking home together, sometimes holding hands, other times Viktor wrapped an arm around Yuuri’s shoulders. They basked in each other’s warmth, the giggles from text messages and the overall happiness that a relationship could bring. They kissed softly at least once a day. Yuuri occasionally licking at Viktor’s bottom lip, or even give a soft nibble to his skin. Viktor always took things slow, their making out sessions always dragging on pleasantly until Yuuri pulled away. Afraid of the next step they could take. He wasn’t ready just yet, and Viktor was perfectly fine with that. 

Though, Yuuri had to admit, he was rather distracted when it came to Viktor. He would wait happily for his text messages, and he always ended up having to borrow notes from someone else. True, he needed to add in more dedication to his studies, but he found himself thinking about taking a break. He felt happy for once. He felt as if he could challenge the world and win. 

**From Viktor  
Hey! What are you up to this Saturday?**

Yuuri hummed as he read the text message, briefly looking from his lap to the Professor in front. The person droning on about the new project the classroom would be working on. Yuuri looked back down at his phone, not wanting to waste time when it came to texting the other.

**To Viktor  
** The same thing.  
Nothing but talking to you c:  
What’s up? 

Part of him was really hoping for a date on the weekend. Maybe they could go ice skating again, despite Yuuri’s bruised knee. He had been craving it again, since the two had become a little more inclined for dinner dates. He wanted to see Viktor on the ice again in the same wonderous form.

**From Viktor  
** Wanted to know if you  
Wanted to go on a date?  
We should go to a Botanical garden?  
Jackson Garden is supposed to be nice. 

Yuuri couldn’t help but smile at the suggestion, it was supposed to be a nice day on Saturday. With a sweater, the two could both enjoy the scenery and maybe if Yuuri wanted too, they could make out a bit.

**To Viktor  
That sounds--**

“Alright everyone, so you’ll need to get into groups of at least five for the project.” Yuuri tensed, looking up from his desk to the Professor. “I’ll give the hand outs as well. So you guys can assign everyone to their assignments.” Oh god, Yuuri had not been paying attention the entire time. He wasn’t even sure what the project was going to be. His heart began to pound brutally as he watched the other students raise. Talking to one another briefly before sitting down in little groups. He was not the type for group projects. Hell, he could hardly hold onto his blooming relationship. How could he walk up to four people and just… _hey let’s be in a group I have no idea what i’m doing._ Yuuri cringed, a few minutes passing by, the groups already building up until each group had five people. All except the group in the very front. It was a self explanatory situation. He found his group, and now he had to introduce himself.

He walked to the front of the class, clearing his throat as the four began speaking to one another. They turned to look at him, “Is it… alright if I join your group?” He asked, his cheeks burning, his throat feeling tight. “Yeah sure.” Yuuri took a moment to identify the four, two girls and two boys, Yuuri making three males. The person who had just talked was the girl, a smile against her features. Her curly blonde hair clinging to her cheeks. “My name is Emma,”She introduced herself, Yuuri taking a seat next to the two males. “I’m Ari.” The second girl with brown hair smiled, Yuuri nodded slightly. His entire body on edge. He hadn’t introduced himself like this in a little while. “James,” The tallest of the men spoke suddenly, looking rather bored as he leaned against one of the desks. “That makes me Henry.” The last male spoke, grinning before leaning back against his chair. “My name is Kats--” He cut himself off quickly, “Yuuri.” One of the first things he had to learn when it came to American English. In the U.S people introduced themselves, first name then last name. It was strange at first for Yuuri, though he was sure that he had gotten used to it by now. Though, his nerves were shot and he was sure that he sounded like an idiot. 

He cleared his throat, one of the girl’s tilting her head slightly. “Did you forget your name for a second?” She laughed slightly, “O-Oh, no I’m--” He cleared his throat again, “Where i’m from it’s custom to say the last name first, then first name.” He explained, trying not to look too embarrassed. “Ooh, I understand. So Yuuri, is that a common name?” Emma asked, Yuuri nodding, “As common as Emma and James.” He admitted, the Professor handing five papers to their groups before moving on. “Alright, alright, let’s get down to this.” Yuuri reluctantly grabbed one of the sheets. He stared down at the paper, realizing that they would be conducting interviews with the local working class. They were supposed to write about the experiences for the locals, how they functioned in the current economy. It didn’t seem to troublesome, but they had to write a collaborated paper that would take some time. The paper explaining that the papers were meant to flow nicely and were in need of theme that expressed all of their interviewees. Such as, the need to go to college, the life of poverty, or working harder than others. Yuuri found himself thinking of Viktor instantly. He was a man working for a business. Maybe he could conduct the interview with him? 

“Okay, so, when should we all meet up for the paper?” James asked, writing his name at the top of the paper. “I’m free on Saturday.” Ari stated, “Same,” Emma agreed, the other two men agreeing as well the two looking at Yuuri. The mans tumbled over his words suddenly. “O-oh! I have plans? I guess, I uh… my b-boyfriend and I are going on a date?” He squeaked out, his heart fluttering at the name for Viktor. He could feel the strange gaze from Henry. A silence draping over the group. “...You can’t cancel? It says the project proposal has to be done by Sunday night. Then the interviews are due by next Wednesday.” Emma spoke abruptly, Yuuri frowning. The others staring down at the male. He wondered if they were uncomfortable with the term he had used. Though, in the current world, most people didn’t seem to care much for sexuality. Or he hadn’t had much trouble in the U.S, at least not since he had arrived. “I suppose. I can tell him we can reschedule.” He tried to contain the shake in his voice. “Good.” He disliked how Emma spoke to him. His gaze falling onto her, seeing a slight look of distaste. “What time should we meet?” James asked suddenly, trying to cut away the tension that had formed in the group. 

“I’m free after twelve.” Ari spoke, the group continuing to agree as Yuuri sat awkwardly. His skin feeling tense. The group seemed to move on without him easily. The male idly writing down the time they needed to meet up. James getting up and telling the Professor the names in the group. The Professor expressing his need for updates, and that if anyone wasn’t contributing that all they had to do was let him know, so he could penalize the lazy student. The words just flew by Yuuri, his body tense, hating how his group saw him now. The class passing by quickly before they were released. Yuuri looking at his text to Viktor, still saved in his drafts. He frowned as he erased the message, knowing that Viktor was probably waiting in the parking lot for him already. He would probably to break it to him in person. 

He made sure to take his time walking. His chest in pain from the anxiety, and he had the sudden need to cry. 

Once he arrived at the parking lot, he could already hear Viktor calling his name. The Russian man all smiles as he ran to Yuuri’s side. “Yuuri~ light of my day!” He laughed, wrapping his arms around the male and giving him a hug. Yuuri reluctantly responding. “That was pretty lame of you to say.” Yuuri laughed, Viktor pulling back. “Really? I was thinking of something to say the entire time I waited!” Viktor laughed, scratching his head briefly before releasing the young man. “Did you get my text?” He asked, Yuuri feeling his shoulders tense. A frown coming to his face, “What’s wrong?” Viktor asked, “I-I can’t. I have to meet up with classmates on Saturday. I have a group project I have to do.” He admitted, recalling how he was looked at differently because of the simple word he had used. “Oh dang! That sucks, if you’re up for it. Want to hang out afterwards? We could just watch a movie at my place? Makkachin misses you!” Viktor asked, Yuuri forcing a smile, “Yeah. I don’t mind that.” Though, he was sure that he would be too tired to deal with any social interaction after dealing with those people again. 

“Great! I’ll make you dinner, I wanted to make something simple, but if you have any requests, let me know.” He insisted, “Oh, do you want to grab dinner right now Yuuri?” His questions were coming quickly, Yuuri usually used to Viktor’s antics. He was also normally enjoying this attention. But the words settled in his chest, the looks and the strange gazes were on his mind. He lost his appetite. He just wanted to go home. He was sure that he was being dramatic over something so small, but even the smallest things could destroy something nice. “No. I’m not really hungry today.” He admitted, Viktor humming, “Okay, do you want to just go home then?” He nodded, Viktor looking slightly sad that the two couldn’t hang out for the rest of the night. “Then i’ll walk you home.” Yuuri wasn’t sure if that was a good idea either. Though he knew that if he denied Viktor to much, he would surely hurt his feelings. 

Despite, Yuuri not being very vocal the entire time. Viktor talked as he normally did, talking about his day at the office. The silly mistranslations he found, and how he managed to correct them before the material was sent out. It was simple things, but normally Yuuri enjoyed hearing about it. He explained that he had a few meetings and he ended up having lunch with Chris. Who was having plenty of fun with his new assistant. If Yuuri hadn't have been in such a bad mood he would ask for elaboration. But he remained silent, Viktor catching onto the foul mood before finally questioning Yuuri at his apartment. 

“Are you okay Yuuri? You seem out of it?” Viktor looked concerned as he stared at Yuuri. The other man trying to withhold his tears that he had been fighting off. “Just an off day. I'm okay.” He wasn't exactly lying, but part of him wanted to tell Viktor everything that had happened. But he was sure that if he complained, it would only bother the man. “Are you sure?” Viktor asked, tilting his head slightly, Yuuri responding with a nod and a small smile. “I'm alright. I think I just need a hot shower and my bed.” Viktor laughed, “Okay, I won't hold you then.” The older man leaned over suddenly, his lips softly pressing against Yuuri’s cheek. He stayed still for a moment, Yuuri enjoying the warm feeling for the moment before mumbling a thank you and good night. 

\--x-- 

Yuuri didn't sleep again. 

It was one of the worst nights, the times where insomnia took over and he was sure that he would die. His chest was tight while he cried, sobbing loudly into his pillow before he sat up. His nose was clogged, making it harder to breath, his head pounding. The worst types of nights, the need to be held, but being to lonely and afraid to ask for help. He wanted his mom. He wanted Phichit, he wanted someone to make him feel better. But after years of dealing with this horrible pain inside, he knew better than to expect anyone to help him. No one could possibly understand he thought, no one could understand this horrible, twisting feeling inside of his stomach. He coughed before forcing himself to the bathroom, washing his face and blowing his nose. His fingers turning the light on and revealing his red eyes, his skin looked splotchy, showing how much he had cried. He cursed himself, his mind returning to the source of his sobbing. The judgement, the constant reminder that Yuuri Katsuki was worth the amount of scum on the streets. Even when he was younger, people proved to him. 

The bullying that started years ago, left him scarred and broken inside. The mocking tones, the clenched fists into his collar with every brutal hit. The wish that someone would notice, someone would realize that he was hurting, that they would save him. Alas, no one came for Yuuri. With the gain of weight in middle school, and the brutal increase of bullying he spent most nights like this. Clinging to the thought, that maybe it wasn't worth it anymore. 

He cleared his throat, returning to his bed, sitting among his sheets before looking at his phone. 

**From Viktor  
** Hey cutie  
I hope you feel better (^3^) 

Yuuri smiled, his fingers moving to the keyboard. Wondering if he should reply, and tell Viktor how he felt. Though it was late now, he was sure that Viktor was asleep. Plus it would make things awkward, Viktor wouldn't want to hear his problems anyway. He turned his phone off before laying back, staring up at the ceiling until the sun began to rise. 

He stood awkwardly at the entrance to the cafe. His head pounding while he wondered if he was at the right place. He hadn't slept for another two days. Work being miserable, his eyes holding dark black circles as he shivered. He felt like puking, the anxiety keeping him on edge. Thankfully he had the day off yesterday, and he avoided text messages from Viktor, making an excuse that he was knee deep in homework to hang out. Which was partially true, but he already missed hanging out with the man. They had fun, and he wanted to go ice skating again. 

Yuuri took a deep breaths, spotting Henry as he walked up. His mind distracted by his cell phone before he waved to Yuuri. The Japanese male nodded in response, the other three joining them a few minutes later. “Alright, so we gotta do interviews right? I already conducted one with my dad over the phone.” Emma explained, Ari explaining that she did the same thing with her father. James and Henry claiming they asked another family member, such as their Uncle and mom. Yuuri was the only one who hadn't conducted an interview. “Sorry, I didn't know we had to, I thought we had to do that after the meeting?” Yuuri tried not to stutter, his hands shaking. “Well, I mean, if you had a chance why not do it?” Emma questioned, Yuuri’s jaw clenching. “I didn't have a chance.” He explained, “What about that ‘boyfriend’ of yours? Or does he not work?” He could ask Viktor, but he didn't want to bother him. “I haven't seen him in a few days.” He admitted, “I'll ask him when I see him.” Yuuri cleared his throat, Ari humming slightly, “So we can't do anything right now. What about the proposal? What theme should we have? My dad explained that he worked pretty well in the economy. He makes decent money.” Yuuri tried not to roll his eyes, recalling how hard he was currently struggling with his financial aid, and his job. He barely had enough money to support himself. 

Viktor seemed well off, but he didn't flaunt his money. Yuuri wondered if he had a lot of money to survive in the economy. “Same with my dad. Like he struggled during the recession, but now things are great! He just got a raise about a month ago.” Yuuri stared down at the table, trying to keep himself awake from their constant drone. His eyesight went fuzzy briefly before he cleared his throat. Straightening his back and looking at the group. “Are you falling asleep?” James questioned, finding himself snickering. “Sorry!” He jumped, clearing his throat once more. “I've been busy, so I haven't slept--” “--Busy with the boyfriend?” Ari snickered, Yuuri finding himself tensing. Snide remarks. A reminder that he fucking hated people. He couldn't stand the idea that he had to work with these assholes just for a grade. At this point, fuck the grade. “...Sorry, I forgot to mention I have work in a few hours. Send me the proposal, and I'll have the interview done by Wednesday.” He spoke through a clenched jaw, his body moving on it's own as he left the table, and then the cafe. 

His body trembled as he walked, realizing full well what he had done. They were going to email his Professor, tell them that Yuuri wasn't contributing, he was going to fail. He was going to fail like he always did. He cursed under his breathe, finding himself too exhausted to cry anymore. His body carrying him home and to his bed. His body curling under the sheets before he drifted off into a brief sleep. His body walking up two hours later. The short nap leaving him unsatisfied, his head hurting again and feeling even more exhausted. 

Yuuri slept two hours on Sunday. His mind wandering as he read the proposal his group sent him. A click of his tongue leaving him as he read over it. Something along the lines of the working class doing perfectly well in this economy. Yuuri found himself annoyed as he crawled back into bed. Remaining there for the rest of the night before getting ready for work. 

His lack of sleep made him irritable, his frown deep against his features as he walked to his work. His phone filled with messages from Viktor, wanting to know how he was doing, wondering if he was almost done with homework. Yuuri couldn't help but feel annoyed by how smothered he was. No he didn't want to talk, he wanted to fucking sleep. He was tired, he was so anxious he was on the verge of puking, and he didn't have time for love. He walked into the coffee shop, Phichit smiling and waving. “Yuuri! The new guy is coming him at ten today! I'm so excited to meet him, hoping he's fast like April, cause the rush will be brutal as always.” Yuuri forced a weak smile before taking a sip of his usual coffee, moving to the back to drop his things off. He returned to the front, his eyes closing briefly as he leaned against the counter. “What’s up Yuuri?” Phichit asked, the other man swallowing dryly, “Hard night.” More like, a hard week. He was so on edge, the anxiety ruining his entire being. Why was it so bad? “Want to talk about it?” Phichit asked, Yuuri shaking his head, “If I do i’ll just cry.” He admitted, “So we’ll talk about it after work. You can come over, and we can watch a movie? Then I can hold you while you cry?” Yuuri gave out a choked laugh, looking back at his friend. “You’re the best.” He took a moment to hold onto his tears. The beginning of the rush starting as he moved to take the first order. 

The hours went by slower, Yuuri dreading the moment when Viktor came in. Wondering if he was angry at Yuuri for not responding to his text messages. His stomach was still hurting, the caffeine in his body leaving his heart beating at a million miles a minute, the feeling only getting worse when Viktor walked in. 

He was smiling, as usual, looking towards Yuuri before giving a small wave. “Yuuri! Did you finish your homework?” He asked, coming up to the counter, Yuuri staring down at the milk steamer. “Yeah.” His voice cracked, Viktor staring in sudden concern. “Yuuri?” The young man cleared his throat, “Sorry, it’s kind of busy, mind waiting for me to make your drink?” Yuuri asked, Viktor falling silent before taking a step back and giving his best smile. 

Yuuri continued to work, finishing off the drink he had in his hand and bestowing it to the customer. The man taking a sip and taking a step away. Yuuri continuing onto his next two drinks, steaming two pots of a milk on both steamers while he poured the espresso. “Excuse me?” Yuuri looked up, the man who had just left looking towards him. “How can I help you?” Yuuri asked, giving his best smile. “I wanted a mocha but this takes like just milk and espresso.” The man stated, his tone off putting. “Oh, i’m sorry.” He quickly apologized, “Well… are you going to make me another one?” He asked, his head tilting slightly, his glare becoming piercing. “Yes, of course. Just give me a moment, I have to finish th--” “--You’re not going to remake it?” His voice came out loudly, Yuuri jumping for a brief moment. “I-I will, i’m making someone else--” “--Where’s your manager?” The man demanded, slamming the cup of coffee onto the counter, splashing the contents up against the top. Yuuri shuddered, “Um… w-well we don’t really have one. Uh… let me see--” He looked over his shoulder towards Phichit, finding his best friend with another customer. “Phichit?” He called his name, his friend looking over before Yuuri gesture to him. “Come here please.” He squeaked out, Phichit quickly moving towards him. “Sorry, how can I help you sir?” Phichit asked, the man clicking his tongue in annoyance. “Yeah, this guy made me a shitty drink, then he said he wouldn’t make me another.” He pointed towards Yuuri, the young man staring down at the coffee cup that had spilled against the counter. 

He couldn’t breath. He couldn’t breath anymore. His stomach tightened, his gaze catching onto Viktor who looked on in distaste. Everyone was staring at him. Listening to his failures. Listening how Yuuri Katsuki fucked up again. He found himself cringing, suddenly moving passed Phichit and towards the back. His eyes following behind the small hallway. No, no, no, that was wrong, it was too small. There wasn’t any fucking air in this place. He quickly turned around and rushed from the coffee shop, Phichit calling out to him as Yuuri fled onto the sidewalk. Practically running to the nearest alleyway he found himself struggling to breath. His airway was tight as he panted violently, pacing back and forth in the nasty filthy hallway. His brain swirled with utter terror, the idea of failure, the hatred inside of his very body. He sobbed violently while he tried to breathe. 

He wasn’t sure how much time had passed, listening to his breathing before hearing footsteps coming down the alley. He looked over his shoulder, his eyes falling upon Viktor. “Yuuri? Yuuri are you okay?” The man asked, Yuuri trembling as he continued to pace. “I don’t…” he panted, “That guy--that--that man is mad--in trouble.” He panted, gasping for air as Viktor neared closer. “No you’re not. It’s okay Yuuri. Yuuri it’s okay.” Yuuri shook his head, continuing to pace. “Do you need anything? Yuuri, do you want me to call someone?” He shook his head, “No, no--I--I’m sorry.” He breathed, covering his mouth as he shook. “Yuuri, its okay. You’re not in trouble. You did so well. I would have punched that guy. You’re amazing.” Yuuri sobbed, the minutes dragging on as he began to slow. His body feeling utterly drained, his breathing slowing. “Are you okay?” Viktor asked, the man nodding, “I’m… so tired.” Yuuri cried, Viktor shrugging off his suit jacket before setting it on the ground. “Here, go ahead and take a seat.” Viktor reached for Yuuri, holding his hand out before easing the young man down. “T-thank you.” He breathed, his body shaking as he took deep breathes. 

"Do you feel okay now?” Yuuri shrugged his shoulders, “I just…” He trailed off, Viktor looking down at the other in concern. “Yuuri, what happened?” He questioned softly, “.... a lot of stuff.” He sobbed in reply, “Do you want to talk about it?” Viktor asked, Yuuri taking comfort in how soft his voice was. “You know… your voice is so warm.” Yuuri wiped his tears away with the sleeve of his shirt. “It reminds me of milk and honey. I love being with you. I love hanging out with you. I just feel so bad. I keep messing things up. I’m just… so sorry.” Yuuri apologized, “Why are you sorry? I-Is this why you’re upset?” Yuuri shook his head, “No… i’ve just… it’s a lot of pressure Viktor. I have this project in school, and the group i’m in were being total jerks and I can’t sleep. I’m just… i’m under so much stress Viktor.” He sobbed, Viktor looking down quietly before kneeling in front of the other. “Yuuri. Yuuri it’s okay. If you need a break, take a break. You work so hard, everytime I see you, you do your best. You’re one of the hardest workers I have ever seen. And every hard worker needs a break. When you’re overwhelmed, take the time. If you’re in a shitty group at school, talk to your Professor. Let them know how uncomfortable you are. Maybe they can help you.” Viktor encouraged, his hand coming to gently caress Yuuri’s cheek. “You should see a doctor too. This life you’re living Yuuri, it’s not healthy.” Yuuri nodded, “I’m just...scared.” Yuuri admitted, closing his eyes and leaning against Viktor’s gentle touch. “I can go with you… if you want? Make an appointment and let me know, i’ll take the day off.” Viktor explained, “You don’t have too.” Yuuri replied, “I want too. I care for you Yuuri, I want to take care of you.” Viktor spoke softly, leaning forward and kissing Yuuri’s forehead. 

“Can you trust me?” That was a difficult question to consider. Yuuri enjoyed the closeness, the care that Viktor was taking. Maybe… maybe he could take a shot and trust this person. 

Viktor looked up when footsteps were heard coming down the alley. Phichit looking overwhelmed with concern. “Yuuri! Are you alright?”Phichit asked, kneeling beside the two men. “I-I’m okay now.” Yuuri spoke, forcing a smile. “You don’t look okay. I kicked that guy out, told him he couldn’t make my best friend cry. But you really need to go home Yuuri. You look awful...the new guy should be here in a few minutes. Head home Yuuri,” Yuuri’s stomach twisted with new anxiety, “I don’t think--” “--I’ll call the boss and let her know.” Phichit insisted, “Yuuri, this is the first step in taking a break. I’ll take you home, okay?” Viktor insisted, Yuuri finally nodding. “O-Okay.” 

The ride home was quick, Viktor calling a cab for the two. His hand holding onto Yuuri’s, comforting him, the entire time he tried to stop the trembling in his fingers. “Do you mind if I come up?” Viktor ask once they left the cab and Viktor paid. “I want to make sure you’re okay. I’ll tuck you into bed?” He was being insistent, Yuuri smiling before finally nodding. “Thank you.” Viktor returned the smile with his own before wrapping an arm around the other. Walking closely to him as they made their way to Yuuri’s apartment. The two walking in, “Alright, first thing’s first, you need to get into your most comfortable pajamas.” Viktor spoke, Yuuri laughing, “My most comfortable?” Viktor nodded, “Yup! Next, i’m going ask you were your favorite drink is, so I can make it for you.” Yuuri smiled, “Chamomile is okay. It’s in the cupboard by the fridge.” Yuuri zombied his way to his room, closing the door behind him as he stripped himself of his clothing. Grabbing his favorite shirt and pajama bottoms and slipping them on before crawling into his bed. 

His body was still incredibly tense, his heart still occasionally pounding as he attempted to get relaxed. “Room service~!” Viktor called as he opened the bedroom door. “I hope you’re not decent~!” He sang, Yuuri snickering before spotting the man with a hot mug in his hands. “I have brought you your nice tea. Now, I will tuck you in.” Yuuri laughed, Viktor setting the tea by his bedside table. The man sitting on the edge of the bed before pulling the blanket up to Yuuri’s chest. “Thank you Viktor.” Yuuri spoke softly, taking a deep breathe. “Do you need anything else?” Viktor asked, his smile leaving a pleasant warmth in Yuuri’s chest. “Um… a kiss would be nice?” Yuuri asked, smiling gently. “Your wish is my command.” Viktor leaned forward, Yuuri’s eyes closing before lips pressed against his own. The kiss remaining simple and sweet before Viktor pulled away. “Anything else Yuuri?” Viktor whispered, “Don’t you have work?” Yuuri asked, practically whimpering. The soft lips moving to the corner of his mouth. “I’ll call off. I’ll stay with you. If you need me.” Yuuri whimpered again, feeling tears against his eyes. “I don’t want to bother you.” He breathed, “Never, i’ll stay with you Yuuri. Let me lay with you.” He breathed, Yuuri scooting over slightly. “Okay.” Yuuri laid back, Viktor kicking off his shoes before laying on the bed, wrapping an arm around Yuuri. “You need to sleep okay? When you wake up, i’ll make you something to eat.” Viktor smiled, kissing Yuuri’s chest. “Okay… thank you.” Yuuri replied quietly, closing his eyes and letting himself finally sleep 


End file.
